


Quarter to Midnight

by SuperWhoLock94



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2017-12-10 23:28:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 34,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/791415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperWhoLock94/pseuds/SuperWhoLock94
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean goes to a local college, doing his laundry before he goes home. But a certain person has his eyes. And their relationship grows over a laundry accident.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pink panties

** SPN **

Dean threw his load of laundry into the tumbler, putting in the quarter’s one at a time. He had had a long day and just wanted to get home to his bed. But he needed to get this done because in the next week, he would be heading home to Sammy, his squatch of a brother.

He couldn’t wait to get home to him. And Sam’s fiancé, Jess, of course. Dean smiled as he thought about how happy she made his little brother, and how happy he made her. They had been together for a while when Sam finally popped the question. And Dean hadn’t even seen his kid brother smile so big when she said yes.

Dean returned to his laundry, thinking about the stuff he had to do before he went to see Sam when someone caught his eye.

A man sitting on top of the dryer in a white button-up shirt with a blue tie and black pants that fit him very well. His hair was black as ink, and his jaw line… Dean felt a shiver run through him. He had never really taken notice to too many men unless he had a couple beers in him.

But this one caught his eye, and Dean was very grateful.

He was doing some kind of puzzle book, concentrating hard and chewing his bottom lip. His smile grew bigger as he took in the man before him.

 “Hey.” Dean gave him his most flirtacious smile, making his dimples even more prominent. The man tilted his head, not looking directly at Dean. His smile faltered.

He turned his head and saw what he was looking at.

His roommate’s pink, satin panties.

Dean felt his face redden, hiding his face in his hand, getting ready to turn and run. How could he have those in _his_ laundry? They don’t even share the same basket! His face was now the shade of a cherry, making his Stanford hoodie unbearably warm at that moment.

He felt the man wiggle next to him on the dryer, and then feeling electrifyingly warm fingers brush against the back of his hand.

Dean moved his head, barely enough to look through his fingers to see a hand extended toward him. The man said, “Castiel.”

…What?

Dean’s mind went blank as soon as he had a view of the man’s face from the front. His lips were pink, pointed on the cupid’s bow that you could cut glass on them, his hair all wrestled looking as though someone just ran their fingers through them… Then there were his eyes. They were blue, and not just blue but every shade imaginable all put into one, with every shade peeking through when he tilted his head. Thick eye lashes coming out from his heavy eyes, looking as though he had seen too much. He had a slight crease in between his eyebrows, giving him this puzzled look. His five o’clock shadow accentuating his strong jaw line. 

Dean decided that in that moment, he would do anything to see that quizzical look whenever he got the chance.

He realized that- Castiel was it? - still had his hand outstretched waiting for Dean to take it.

He put his hand in the strange man’s and felt a jolt work its way up his arm, into his toes and right back up again. And stayed in his heart causing it to pick up double time. Castiel and himself looking at their hands and back up to each other.

“Hey, name’s Dean.” He looked at the pink panties sitting on the edge of his basket again and felt the blush work its way back up his neck. He was still holding this man’s hand and didn’t mind. But Castiel withdrew his and looked back at Dean.

Saying with his head still down, “I swear those aren’t mine. My roommate must have thrown them in there by accident.” Castiel smiled, leaving Dean to ramble to himself about embarrassment.

“I was not going to say anything. But since you brought it up.” He smiled, and it was breathtaking. His lips stretched across his bright white teeth showing the top row, with dimples forming by the corners of his mouth.

Dean’s smile turned into a grin, watching the man sitting across from him.

“How come I’ve never seen you here before?”

“I am just merely passing through. I am on my way and needed to wash my clothes before I left.”

Dean’s heart sunk. Just his luck, he found someone that he was getting along with, someone he wanted to get to know and they were “passing through”.

“Oh… You aren’t from around here?”

“I am, I go to the local college. What about you?” Umph, again with the head tilt, Dean thought, swallowing the lump that grew in his throat.

“I do too. But I am leaving here in the next week to go home.”

“Peculiar, that is where I am heading too. Where is it that you call home Dean?”

“Lawrence, Kansas. My brother and father live there. But Sam, my brother, goes to Stanford for school. He is on break now, so the nerd is coming home for break.”

Cas had this strange look on his face, the crease between his eyes deepening further as he turned to look at Dean.

“Really? My brother just opened a business there. He graduated college in business management, now opening his own party business.”

Dean shook his head. This could not possibly be happening. They were going to the same place? “What? You are going to Lawrence?”

“Yes I am. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, fine. Just a little weirded out I guess.”

How could his luck get any better?! Meeting a really hot gu- shit. What if he wasn’t gay? He could only hope that he was, and he was determined to find out. Dean snapped back looking at the beautiful… angel sitting in front of him, the only way to describe what he looked like.

“Hey, you wanna go grab some coffee or a beer? I know this great place that has both. And pie.”

“I will take you up on that offer Dean. But I have never had pie.”

His mouth gaping open, staring at the blue-eyed man, watching as he started to laugh. “You’ve never had pie? Like ever? You haven’t lived! We’re going. Now.”

Dean took Cas’ hand, making him put his book down and dragging him out the door, hearing Cas shout behind him “Dean, what about our st-“, cut off by Dean opening the passenger door.

“We won’t be gone more than half an hour. Promise,” holding up three fingers up as if in a promise. Cas’ face reddened with adoration then slid awkwardly into the passenger seat with Dean shutting the door behind him.

** SPN **

He looked at the man, watching him become red again as he looked at the panties that were draped over the edge of his basket. He realized that their hands were still clasped together, and truth-be-told, Castiel did not mind at all. He wanted to keep the green-eyed man’s hand in his.

Dean was explaining about how they weren’t his. Castiel stared at the man, admiring his facial structure. He has exceptional cheek bones and his jaw line was equally if not stronger. You could cut something on it. His nose was crooked, looking as though he had been hit and never corrected the break. And his lips, Castiel wanted to touch them, to feel the roughness and warmth of them.

“I was not going to say anything, but since you brought it up.” Castiel gave him his best heart-warming smile. He watched, laughing inwardly as he saw Dean’s smile turn into a grin, almost taking up the lower half of his face. The smile causing small wrinkles by his eyes.

“How come I’ve never seen you here before?”, Dean asked curiously.

“I am just merely passing through. I am on my way and needed to wash my clothes before I left.”

Cas saw Dean’s face fall, but it was gone in moments, his smile coming back on.

“Oh… You aren’t from around here?”

“I am, I go to the local college. What about you?”  Cas felt his head tilt and immediately, Dean’s eyes grew and watched as Dean swallowed, Cas’ pants reacting to the stretched neck.

“I do too. But I am leaving here in the next week to go home.”

Cas could not believe his luck.

“Peculiar, that is where I am heading too. Where is it that you call home Dean?”

“Lawrence, Kansas. My brother and father live there. But Sam, my brother, goes to Stanford for school. He is on break now, so the nerd is coming home for break.”

Cas knew he had a strange look on his face, the crease between his eyes deepening further as he turned to look at Dean. Was this really happening?

“Really? My brother just opened a business there. He graduated college in business management, now opening his own party planning business.”

Cas watched as the blonde spikey-haired head shook from side to side. “What? You are going to Lawrence?” Dean’s voice seemed almost airy and unconvinced of… something but what?

“Yes I am. Are you okay?” Dean looked like he was about to have a stroke.

“Yeah, fine. Just a little weirded out I guess.”

Castiel looked at him, watching him think, a crease forming between his eye brows and chewing on his lower lip.

“Hey, you wanna go grab some coffee or a beer? I know this great place that has both. And pie.”

“I will take you up on that offer Dean. But I have never had pie.”

Dean’s mouth popped open in an “O”. Cas laughed at this notion.

“You’ve never had pie? Like ever? You haven’t lived! We’re going. Now.”

Cas felt butterflies enter his stomach, causing him to smile. Dean had grabbed his hand dragging him off the dryer that he was sitting on, and pulling him out the door. Cas started to say “Dean, what about our stuff?” but was cut off by the shock that overcame him. Dean was holding his door open for him.

“We won’t be gone more than half an hour. Promise,” and Dean held up three fingers as a promise.

Cas put his head down to hide the blush sneaking onto his cheeks. He slid into the black Impala and watched Dean as he shut the door and walked around the front of the car.

** SPN **

Dean was suddenly struck with nerves as he realized what he was doing. He was taking Cas out to dinner. Well just coffee really. It was a start though. Dean smiled and climbed into his baby.

“Okay, you’re gonna have to trust me on this. I know this really awesome night pub. I’m friend with the owner and she loves me.” Dean winked for emphasis, and knew it was a good idea. Cas gulped, almost loud enough for Dean to look at him. But he saw it. Dean pulled into the road and took off.

….

They pulled into The Roadhouse parking lot, next a timeworn, very dirty Camaro.

Dean turned so he could see Cas, and was breath-taken again. He didn’t think he would ever get use to the man’s profile. But Dean couldn’t let that get in the way of Cas trying one of the seven wonders of the world.

“Are you ready to try one of the most delicious things to ever touch your tongue?”

Dean grinned as he saw Cas scoff and look like he was about to say something but then changed his mind and shaking his head as he climbed out of the car.

Dean groaned as he got a perfect view of Cas’ ass.

 


	2. Pie and Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas go for a late night treat, and learn quite a bit about each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a pretty long chapter, but I hope you enjoy it! Chapter three to be coming soon. Please feel free to review. :D

 

** SPN **

Dean starred at Cas as he took in the front of the Roadhouse. He saw Ellen approach the door, “Are you men coming in or are you going to stand out there all night?”

Dean laughed while walking around the car to stand next to Cas. Ellen turned around to head to table.

“Cas, that is Ellen. She became my mother when I moved here, and her husband Bobby,” Dean pointed to the rusted Camaro next to them, “has become my father away from home. And they have a daughter and son, names are Jo and Ash. Be warned, Ash is a little on the weird side but the guy is smart.”

Dean opened the door for Cas, watching him walk in and stand awkwardly in the doorway.

“Honey, don’t be shy! Get in here. If you are a friend of Dean’s, you’re a friend of ours.” Ellen shouted from behind the bar. The man sitting in front of her in a plaid shirt and baseball cap turned on the stool with a glass of whiskey in his hand.  “Dean! Get over here ya idgit.”

Dean looked at his favorite drunk, walking over to him and hugging him. Of course it was a manly hug.

“How ya doin’ boy?” Bobby’s smile always made those around him smile. He had the crinkles around his eyes while almost being squinted shut. He didn’t have a toothy grin but when he did, it lit up his face.

“Good Bobby. Doin’ laundry before I go home. You know how it goes. Bobby, Ellen, this is Cas. Just met him and thought I would bring him here to have Jo’s famous pie as his first slice.” Dean smiled at Cas, causing him to blush.

“Actually, it’s Castiel but Dean gave me this nickname.” Dean inwardly groaned at Cas’ deep rough voice.

“So you’ve never had pie before?”

“No, Ellen.”

“Well then let me get Jo and she can bring you out her choice of pie.”

“Hey Ellen, can I get a beer and…” Dean looked at Cas, “a coffee, please.”

Dean would do anything short of murder to hear him talk.

Jo brings over two pieces of apple pie, and sets them down in front of Dean and Castiel. Dean smiles at Cas, who blushes, and Dean immediately digs into his piece. He moans, tasting the cinnamon and nutmeg and apple with the crunch of the crust on his tongue. After eating over half of his piece, he looks up at Cas. What is doing?

Cas is sitting there, looking at his pie like he isn’t sure what the next step is. He looks at Dean.

“What are you doing, Cas? You’re supposed to take your fork, stick it into the pie, and then shove the fork into your mouth, enjoying the beautiful taste filling your mouth.”

Dean does this to show Cas what to do. He watches as Cas takes a fork full of pie and hesitantly put into his mouth. He pauses, then moves his jaw, then stops. His eyes give way, but his body language says other. Dean starts to smile as he sees Cas start to smile at this.

“Thank you, Dean. That is the best thing I have ever tasted.”

Dean went back to shoving his piece into his mouth in forkfuls. After they were both done, Dean said “If I wasn’t playing for the other team, I would marry Jo for her pie.” Cas looks at Dean, and tilts his head. Dean loves this. But was caught off guard by a towel being thrown at him. He turned around to see Jo doubled over, laughing at him with soapy, wet hands. He looked back at Cas to see him covering his mouth and hiding his laugh, getting the crinkles around his eyes. Dean felt his mouth widen and his heart speed up as he looked at the man sitting in the booth across from him. The laugh being the most beautiful noise he had ever heard, sounding rough and loving and genuine.

After they were both done laughing, Dean looked at Cas, “Wanna get to know each other?”

“Of course, Dean.”

“So what is it you are going to school for?”

“I am going to school studying history of religion. I am a freshman, soon to be a sophomore. The same goes to you Dean, what are you going for?”

“Wow Cas, that’s pretty heavy stuff. I’m going for auto-repair and detailing. I work with Bobby over there at his place right now, but I’m hoping that I can open my own at some point.” Dean smiled, and made a motion towards Cas, “What’s your family like?”

Dean worried he struck a nerve when Cas stayed quiet. Cas had the crease between his eyebrows again, Dean went to shift his weight and was startled when Cas said, “One moment.” So Dean sat waiting.

“My family… they were very religious. My father was a pastor at our church. My mother was a significant part of our worship team. One night I went to bed, they were there. I woke up the next morning to my brother Gabriel shaking me awake, I knew something was wrong. My other brother Balthazar was on the phone with the police. My parents were missing. My brothers and I looked everywhere for them and nothing came forward. We never heard from them again. Since Balthazar was of age, he took care of us. We moved to a small town in Illinois, and then I came here for school. Gabriel went to school, and like I said before now owns the business in Lawrence. And here I sit across from you.”

Dean sat. He didn’t know what to say. “How long ago was this Cas?” Cas got the look again, saying “Eight years.”

“And that is why you’re interested in the history of religions? Because of your parents?”

“Mostly. But I myself like history and find it very intriguing. It is something that never changes and you can usually predict.”

Dean really didn’t know what to say now, so he asked another question and that was that. “No chick flick moments,” he said to himself.

So they talked more about school, work, and stuff they do in their free time. He found out that Cas sells radio space, the most exciting job in the world but he gets paid enough to live off of. He found out a lot more about the strange man, and still didn’t think he knew enough. He wanted to _know_ this man, in every way possible.

….

About an hour or so later, Dean happened to look at his watch, “Oh shit!” cutting Cas off mid-sentence. “What is wrong Dean?” He looked at Cas with a worried expression, “It’s been almost two hours Cas. I promised to take you back almost an hour and a half ago.”

Cas’ expression turned thoughtful and then he smiled, “It is quite alright Dean. I do not mind because that means the longer I can avoid laundry.”

Dean smiled and was thankful he understood. The men said good night and Dean led Cas back to the car, moving his hips a little more than he usually does but he wanted to give Cas the full affect.

….

They get back to the matt, and get back to find that their clothes had been removed from the machines to be sitting in hampers. He looks at Cas take his clothes out of the hamper and start to fold as Dean did the same.

He looks up from his shirt, “Cas, let me give you a ride home. You don’t need to be walking around this late at night. It’s the least I can do man, for keeping you out so late.”

Cas smiles, getting the wrinkles again. “I will be quite alright Dean. I think I can manage walking four blocks.”

“Cas, let me take you. Please, I feel awful for keepin’ you out so late.”

He had gone back to folding his clothes, hearing Cas take a deep breath. “If you must.”

“Awesome.” Dean was done folding his clothes and was waiting for Cas to fold the last few. They both clambered into the 1967 Chevy Impala, Dean’s baby, and the passenger told him where to go. They soon pulled up in front of a tall apartment complex, white with blue shutters on all the windows. It wasn’t a bad looking place at all. Dean fiddled with his hands, not wanting this to be the end of his night. Cas turned towards Dean but he cut him off.

“Cas. I hope you don’t mind that I uh… play for the other team.” Still fiddling with his hands as he looked at him.

“I don’t understand that reference Dean.”

Closing his eyes and not letting his nerves get the best of him, “Cas… I’m gay.”

“Oh. Well Dean,” and Dean almost lost it at what Cas did next, making the quote motion with his hands, “I play for the other team too.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. “Awesome.”

** SPN **

_Maybe if you draw this out long enough, he will get antsy,_ Castiel thought to himself as he put the fork full of pie into his mouth, watching and turning it over in his mouth and tasting all the spices that were lighting up all the right places.

“Thank you, Dean. That is the best thing I have ever tasted.”

Dean went back to shoveling pie into his mouth, and Castiel had to laugh at this. He finished the rest of his pie, a minute after Dean who was already opening a second beer.

“If I wasn’t playing for the other team, I would marry Jo for her pie.” Before he could ask what he meant by it, a wet rag was coming directly towards Dean, and Castiel had a feeling that he did not know that it was. It hit Dean square in the face and Castiel looked in the direction that it came from to find Jo doubled over laughing, causing her face to go red. Castiel could not help but laugh at this, which in turn caused Dean to laugh. His laugh was sincere, sounding deep, loving and just Dean-like, even though Cas had only known the man for less than two hours. He made a mental note to ask him later about the reference.

They make small talk after Dean asks if they want to get to know each other. Cas, of course agrees. He wants to know everything about the man. They talk about school and then “What’s your family like?”

Cas was taken off guard, of course. He never talked about his family, usually avoiding the subject. But he felt like he could trust Dean more than most people. He saw that worried look on Dean’s face when he saw him, he held up one finger, “One moment.”  

Cas decided on where he wanted to start. “My family… they were very religious. My father was a pastor at our church. My mother was a significant part of our worship team. One night I went to bed, they were there. I woke up the next morning to my brother Gabriel shaking me awake and I knew something was wrong. My other brother Balthazar was on the phone with the police. My parents were missing. My brothers and I looked everywhere for them and nothing came forward. We never heard from them again. Since Balthazar was of age, he took care of us. We moved to a small town in Illinois, and then I came here for school. Gabriel went to school, and like I said before now owns the business in Lawrence. And here I sit across from you.”

Castiel folded his hands on the table and waited for Dean to respond. He knew that he laid a lot upon him but he could trust him.

Dean sat for a moment then said “How long ago was this Cas?” Castiel thought for a moment, the nickname that had been given to him sending his heart to high speeds every time he heard it. He thought and said “Eight years.”

“And that is why you’re interested in the history of religions? Because of your parents?”

“Mostly. But I myself like history and find it very intriguing. It is something that never changes and you can usually predict.”

Dean had the crease on his forehead again and then asked another question. Castiel assumed that it was a way to avoid a deep moment. He would never know. Castiel went with it, and they talked more about school, work, what they did in their free time. Castiel told him about his job which was selling radio space. Castiel had to laugh at it, hearing how ridiculous it sounded but Dean seemed sincerely intrigued so he kept talking, answering every question that was thrown at him.

….

About an hour or so later, Dean looked at his watch, “Oh shit!” cutting Castiel off mid-sentence. “What is wrong Dean?” Castiel looked at him with a worried expression fearing that something bad has happened or that he was late for something. “It’s been almost two hours Cas. I promised to take you back almost an hour and a half ago.”

Castiel thought about this bit of information and smiled, he didn’t mind at all. “It is quite alright Dean. I do not mind because that means the longer I can avoid laundry.” He figured that a small joke would help ease Dean’s worry.

The men went to say good night to Ellen, Bobby and Jo, then turned to leave. Castiel was grateful that he had chosen to walk behind Dean. He has never seen jeans look so good before on anyone. He quite liked the pockets of them as well. Cas smiled as they got to the car, thinking of the ass that he had just saw.

….

They arrived back at the matt, Cas gripping the handle after experiencing Dean driving. The men walked in to find that most of their clothes had been removed from the tumblers and dryers to be sitting in hampers. _Great now my clothed are going to be wrinkled,_ Castiel thought. Both started in on folding their laundry. Castiel was so involved that he startled when Dean said “Cas, let me give you a ride home. You don’t need to be walking around this late at night. It’s the least I can do man, for keeping you out so late.”

Cas smiled. He didn’t want to pass him up but it was four blocks away. “I will be quite alright Dean. I think I can manage walking four blocks.”

“Cas, let me take you. Please, I feel awful for keepin’ you out so late.”

Cas thought, thrilled that he gets to spend more time with Dean. He let out a sigh, “If you must.”

“Awesome.”

Once they were both done folding, They got into Dean’s car and Cas told him directions. All too soon, Dean pulled up in front of Castiel’s apartment. He went to go say good night to his taxi when “Cas. I hope you don’t mind that I uh… play for the other team.” Dean was playing with his hands, holding his breath while he waited for Castiel to respond. Castiel remembered that he didn’t know what that meant.

“I don’t understand that reference Dean.”

Closing his eyes, “Cas… I’m gay.”

“Oh. Well Dean,” Castiel made the quote motion with his hands, “I play for the other team too.” This causing Dean to smile and giggle. Castiel was happy he did that because that sound was beautiful.

Dean took a deep breath and smiling said “Awesome.”

Castiel went to say good night again but was cut off by Dean grabbing his hand and pulling the cap off of a marker with his teeth. Castiel gulped.

“Next time you decide to go to the matt, call me and let me take you for dinner.”

Castiel felt butterflies, both from the close proximity of their bodies and being asked out.

“Of course Dean. You have my word.”

With that, he said good night, finally and got out of the car, into his apartment, and up the stairs. After entering his home, he set his laundry down and sat himself next to it. He could not believe how well his night ended. He looked around his one bedroom apartment. The white walls and tan furniture were bothering him. He had a television set that faced the couch, he momentarily thought about seeing what was on but quickly decided against it.

He got up from the couch with a smile on his face, going into his room to get to his closet. He unbuttoned his shirt, throwing it on the bed and then his pants with it. He pulled out a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. He folded his clothes and put them in the soiled pile of clothing, and crawled into bed. He had not realized how tired he was until he walked into his room. He closed his eyes, hoping he would we would dream of his green-eyed friend.

** SPN **

Dean pulls into the driveway of his apartment building, feeling the familiar rub of rocks against his baby’s tires. He couldn’t get the blue eyes out of his head, almost causing him to run a stop sign earlier. He walked into the building, unlocking the door and kicking his boots off out of habit. Until he walked past the mirror in the bathroom, he didn’t feel the giant grin that he had. He couldn’t think of the last time he smiled like this when Sammy wasn’t involved. Dean had done it. He asked Cas out. What would he wear? Cas seemed okay with his layering of shirts, jeans, and boots. He wanted to be himself. But next time, maybe he would scrub a little harder to get the oil stains out of his jeans.

Dean ran through a couple of topics to bring up next time, but it crossed him that tonight’s conversation flowed so easily, it wasn’t forced, bringing around a new topic when something connected them. _It was amazing,_ he thought making his grin grow bigger. But he wanted to make the date after that official. Set up a time, a nice restaurant, and maybe go for a walk.

 _Cas…_ It seemed so natural to say to him, just rolling off his tongue. Cas never said anything, about him offending him or him not liking it. _He answered to it,_ Dean reasoned.

Dean goes to his room, getting into his dresser and grabbing his old Motorhead t-shirt. He slipped his shirt and pants off, leaving them on the floor by the bed and got into bed after slipping on his Motorhead t-shirt.

He closed eyes, hoping he dreamed about his black-haired angel.

 


	3. Cell Phone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CLIFF HANGER HANGING FROM A CLIFF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please feel free to review. I am sorry for grammatical errors :)  
> It is 5:30 in the morning where I live so yeah, I'm a little tired lol  
> Enjoy!!

** SPN **

_BUZZ! BUZZ! BUZZ! BUZZ!_

Dean heard his alarm going off in the distance, coming back from dreaming about his very attractive friend. He lay in bed, thinking about how much his life has changed in the past week.

Nothing too drastic, but just enough to alter it.

After he had met Cas that night, he started going to the laundry matt more often. Dean wanted to run into him. They had talked to each other almost every night, texting or calling. Cas usually got off work at six, which was about the time Dean himself got done working at the shop.

The first night they talked over phone, Dean was at the Roadhouse, talking with Jo when his phone buzzed. He pulled it out thinking it was Sam, but was surprised to see an unknown number.

 **From:**   **785-555-4706**

Hello, is this Dean?

Dean typed out a quick response and hit send.

 **To:**   **785-555-4706**

Yeah, who is this?

A couple minutes went by before his phone went off; giving the name of the person behind the number.

 **From:**   **785-555-4706**

This is Castiel. You told me to get ahold of you.

Dean laughed at Cas, knowing that he thought it was obvious it was him.

**To:** **785-555-4706**

Sorry Cas, didn’t know. Wanna meet up?

That’s how the night continued, they met up and talked. And talked. And talked some more. Dean loved it, getting to know Cas like this. They started with the basics, the other person’s favorite whatever and then they started getting a little bit more difficult to answer. What was their family like? Where had they been raised? What was a dream of theirs? Constantly shooting questions to each other that popped into their minds.

Dean sighed, and rolled himself over to look at his clock.

“SON OF A BITCH!”

Dean had spent the last 20 minutes dreaming about Cas. He was going to be late for work, and he still had to pick up Jo.

He yelled at himself while stripping off his pajamas and getting into the shower. He was in and out in record time, running to his room and grabbing jeans, t-shirt and button-up.  He pulled on his socks, then his boots. Starting to brush his teeth, he walked out to his kitchen, starting the coffee machine, and walking back to the bathroom. But on his way there he noticed someone sitting on the couch.

“Hey Dean.”

Jo was sitting on the couch, flipping through a car magazine and her feet propped up on the table.

“Heeyr Jor,” he said through a mouth full of toothpaste. Spinning around, he caught his hip on the counter of the island, cursing loudly.

** SPN **

Cas feels his pocket vibrating. He takes it out, looking at the caller I.D. to see that it is Dean calling.

“Hello Dean.”

No response. How peculiar. “Dean?”

Again, nothing. Then a muffled noise was coming from the speaker. Like a microphone hitting fabric. Dean had butt-dialed him.

“What should I do Jo?”

“What do you mean what should you do? Ask the man out already!”

“But what if he just wants to stay friends, I don’t deserve someone like him. After learning about him this past week, and him me, he must think I’m scum of the earth or somethin’.”

“He doesn’t think that Dean. He likes you. Why would he text and call you almost every night, talking for hours?”

“Like I said, I think he wants to stay friends. Just strictly that.”

“Ask him out Dean. The worst is that you both will move on and still be friends. You can’t let this fear of yours stop you. See if he wants to go to a really nice restaurant and then maybe walk around downtown?”

“I coul-.”

“ _DEAN!!”_

Cas heard muffling of fabric and then a very quiet, “sonofabitch…”

More muffling, some arguing and then, “how much of that did you hear?”

“Starting with you asking Jo for advice.”

“Shit…”

“Why Dean? Is there something you would like to ask me?” Cas played with it, his smile growing as he thought about Dean being nervous, enjoying this immensely.

“Well I guess. I was gonna see if you wanted to go on an actual date. Make it official.

Cas’ heart fluttered, “I would love to Dean,” gaining speed when he thought about the date ahead of him. After ten days of lying low, it finally paid off.

Silence.

“Dean?”

“Great! I mean awesome. When?”

“How about tonight? Does that work for you?” Castiel could not deny that he wanted this date to happen now but because of work, it would sadly have to wait.

“Okay. Where do you want to meet?”

“You choose Dean. I have to work late tonight so I will meet you.”

“That’s fine Cas. There is this really nice Italian restaurant on Fifth avenue and dress nice.”

He could hear the smile and excitement seep through Dean’s voice. Castiel could barely contain himself.

“Alright Dean. See you tonight at 7:30 p.m.?

“See you then Cas.”

They both hung up, and Cas felt his smile growing even larger, not thinking that it was possible. But Dean made it so. He could not wait for his date tonight. He looked at the clock on his oven, and having a small heart attack, he leaped from the couch, pulling on his shoes and trench coat, pushing himself out the door to work he was 10 minutes late for.

** SPN **

Dean turned around to face Jo, who looked like she was going to bounce off the couch with impatience.

“I asked him and he said yes.” Dean felt his face split, more than it already was.

“ _I TOLD YOU!”_ she practically screamed at him.

Dean acted as if it hurt is ears, faking a wince and covering them. He felt a pillow hit his face and a giggle come from the couch.

“Come on, we are gonna be late.” He picked his keys up off the counter along with his phone and wallet, following behind Jo out the door and onto their day.

On the way to the shop, his stomach kept twisting, excited and nervous for that nights date. He couldn’t wait to see Cas.

….

“Boy, what is wrong with you?”

Dean jumped at the sound of Bobby’s voice suddenly coming from behind him. He spun on his toes, facing him, a wrench in his hand ready to swing. After realizing that it was Bobby, he lowered his weapon and stared at him.

“Dammit Bobby! Don’t just sneak up on someone like that.” He heard Charlie, the secretary, laughing in the front office.

“I didn’t sneak up on you ya idgit. I’ve been standing here for the last five minutes watchin’. I decided to finally say something to get your attention.” Bobby scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Again, what’s wrong with ya?”

Dean thought for a moment, nothing was wrong. Actually, everything was going amazingly. He had family, friends, a job, a home, pie galore thanks to Jo, and now Cas. He smiled to himself, which made Bobby slap his shoulder. Dean startled again.

“Nothing is wrong Bobby. Everything is really good. Honestly.” He held up his hands in innocence. “But there is something…”

“What, kid?”

“I met someone. His name is Cas and I don’t feel like I deserve him. There just isn’t something right. After my last boyfriend, I felt like I would never find anyone to put up with my shit. But he is, he is sticking around and we are going out tonight.”

Bobby sorely smiled, and clasped Dean on the shoulder, “you deserve him. Don’t try to talk yourself out of this one. Just because what happened with that one shouldn’t stop you from this one.”

Jo walked over, looking from Dean to Bobby and back again. “What’s going on?”

Before Dean had the chance to say buzz off, Bobby spoke up. “Dean here feels like he doesn’t deserve this fellow Cas because of what happened with the last boyfriend.”

Jo smacked the back of Dean’s head. “Dean! We had this conversation this morning! Stop talking yourself out of this and go with it.”

Dean thought about it, knowing that they were right. They usually were. “Thanks guys. Okay, fine. I’ll stop.”

Bobby and Jo both smiled, looking they just completed the hardest task in the world and walked off.

Dean got back to work, finding his next customer waiting in office and greeting them with a smile but not for the reason that they think.

….

Dean pulled into the parking lot outside of  _La Bella Italiana_ , a romantic yet settle place that was perfect for a first date. He walked in the door searching for his dark haired man, "are you looking for someone?" Dean smiled at the young man, "yes actually. A young man with black hair, and probably wearing a trench coat." He also has bright blue eyes, a nice ass, and a rocking bod.... Dean pulled himself  back. The man smiled "he hasn't appeared yet but we will keep an eye out for him."

"Thanks." Dean walked over to the table, ordering a whiskey and waiting. He checked his phone to see if Cas had called, coming up empty. He decided he would wait ten minutes before he called because he was a few minutes early. 

....

Ten minutes went by with no sign of or call from Cas. He dialed his number, and listened. Three rings went and then "I don't understand why- why do you want me to say my name," then a few beeps came after. Dean full out laughed at it, never having heard Cas' answering machine. He reminded himself to mention it to him later.

"Hey Cas, it's Dean. I'm just wonderin' where you are. Give me a call when you get this." He hung up. He would wait another ten minutes then call again.

....

Another ten minutes went by and still nothing. Dean started to worry. In the short time that he had known Cas, this is something that he wouldn't do. He would of let Dean know... Right? He dialed the number again and hit send. 

He laughed again at the message, "hey Cas it's me again, I'm just wondering where you are. Being to worry if you ditched me or not," laughing at himself at how desperate he sounded, "talk to you soon." He hit the end button and watched the waiter walk over. "I'm sorry, he is on his way. Can you give him like twenty minutes?" The waiter nodded, "of course, sir. Would you like a refill?" 

"A beer this time please." 

He nodded and walked away, leaving Dean to his thoughts. 

What if Cas actually did ditch him? He figured... Dean thought of himself as just a number, someone that didn't matter because he was just a number. He didn't deserve someone like Cas. He was smart, talented, hot on all levels, and just all over amazing. Dean was... Dean. He had a couple bucks to his name, with a high school diploma, and a car left to him by his dad. He wasn't smart, only when it came to cars and folklore. He could make a mean burger, and nothing else. Cas was a 9 and Dean was a 5. 

Another 15 minutes past, Dean was getting up from his seat, dialing his number when his name came up on the screen. 

"Cas? Where are you?" He chuckled to himself. 

Nothing came from the other end of the phone.

"Cas?"

"Dean... Help."

** SPN **

Castiel pulled into the drive, turned off his car, and ran into the apartment building. He could not help but be excited about his upcoming night. 

Dean had asked him out and he agreed to dinner. They were to meet at an Italian restaurant downtown around 7:30 p.m. whenever Castiel was to get off work. 

After dinner, Castiel was hoping to go for a walk at the park that was on the out skirts of town. They had a long trail that was visible on a clear night. It did not have lights, but many walked it when a full moon was out.

It is also, where many people go on a first date. 

Castiel unlocked his door and dropped his bag onto the floor and the keys on the counter. He took off his trench coat, the one he wore all the time, and hung it on the coat hook by the door. 

Castiel could not decide what to wear. He had on a navy suit, a white button shirt, and a navy tie. That was what he was most comfortable in. A suit and tie. So he picked out a fresh white shirt, a black suit, and a royal blue tie.

Looking at the time and seeing he had 45 minutes until he had to leave, he would take a shower and take his time. 

....

Once out of the shower, he wrapped the towel around his waist and headed into the living room. Grabbing his clothes, he freshly ironed them and made sure that each crease was perfect. He wanted to show Dean his best self. Yes, they had gone on dates and got to know each other bit Castiel wanted to particularly wow Dean. 

He attempted to do something with his hair but it just was not cooperating. He ran his hand through his hair with a little gel on it. It was sticking everywhere and looked as though someone ran their hands through it roughly but it would have to work. He brushed his teeth, and went to the kitchen to get a drink before he went.

Stepping in, he looked at the oven and saw he had fifteen to get to the restaurant. "Shoot!"  He grabbed his keys and wallet and ran out the door.

Hopping into his car, he turned it over, shifted to reverse and flooring it out of his drive. 

Coming to a four way stop to go straight, he glanced at the clock and saw he now only had ten minutes to get there.

He turned left.

He saw a pub up on the left side and slowed down instinctively in case a drunk decided to take a nighttime stroll. 

Headlights whipped out of the drive and came for Castiel. He swerved to the opposite side of the road, attempting to miss the oncoming driver and the truck opposite of him swerved again. Castiel let go of the wheel and blocked his face for what he knew would soon-to-be broken glass. The truck swerved, coming too close to fa-


	4. Timing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean chose left and he needs to know that Castiel is okay.

** SPN **

“Cas?!”

Dean stood up, knocking over the chair in the process but turned to run out the door and sprinted to his car. He threw her in drive and took off to save his angel. He had no idea where Cas was. He could be on any road. There were two main roads leading from his house to the restaurant; one being Main Street and another being a back road. If any time longer than 20 minutes had gone past to when he was supposed to show up, someone would have found him.

Dean turned left, heading for the back road.

He swung around the corner, hearing his baby’s tires screech as he hit the brakes and then gas as the Impala purred her way down the road. Dean’s heart was hammering against his chest, his eyes wide with fear as he imagined what kind of scene he would disc-

“Castiel?!”

No response could be heard from the wreckage. Cas’ jeep was tipped on its side with the driver’s door sitting on the blacktop. The other car was barely recognizable with the front to bits and glass surrounding it. But Dean’s eyes were focused on one car. He got out of his baby, suddenly terrified and shaking with nerves. Dialing 911, it rung once, twice before someone answered. Before they could their introduction out, he was already saying, “Car accident. Bellville Road outside of Lebanon, about a mile down. HURRY!” He hung up as he was running to the jeep; he climbed the back, careful to not jolt the car and crawled to the passenger door. He looked in, the glass being broken out and saw him. His face was crusted in blood, a cut about 4 inches long running the side of his face. His right hand bent under the steering wheel caught between it and his leg. Cas was hanging to the seat by the seatbelt, but his body was limp. How much blood had he lost? Was anything else broken? What if…? Dean couldn’t bear to finish the question that was so prominent in his mind. He needed to know.

Adrenaline took over. Swinging open the door and lowering his upper half in, he grabbed Cas’ arm and pulled him closer so he could feel his pulse. It was light but there. And that’s all Dean had to hold onto. He unbuckled Cas and caught his neck and arm. He pulled lightly, lifting him out of the seat enough to grab under the arms. He heaved, watching as Cas’ head rolled with every motion, not responding to Dean saying his name.

“It’ll be okay, Cas. It’s okay. I’ve got you.”

He pulled him out at last, and threw him over his shoulder, carrying him down the back of the jeep. Immediately sitting on the ground, Dean pulled Cas into his lap and put his head into the space between his arm and shoulder. He began to rock, tears starting to stream down his face and falling onto Cas. He took his shaking hand and placed it against the blue-eyed man’s face, rubbing his calloused thumb across his cheek then moving it to the cut on the right side of his face.

“…Someone’s always coming around here, trailing some new… kill. I said I seen your picture on a hundred dollar bill. And what’s a game of chance to you is one of real skill.”

Dean’s voice cracked but he finished the verse, “so glad to meet you Angeles.”

He bowed his head, touching his forehead with Cas’. “Castiel, please, come back. I’ve got you, I’m here man. Don’t worry all right? You’ll pull through because that’s what you do. You pull through. Right?”

Tears began to stream down his head, a sob breaking through at the last moment.

_“De-…”_

His eyes darted to Cas’, looking for any movement but seeing none.

“Cas?! Come on man. Please wake up. I’ve known you for ten days and yet- and yet I need you. I need you Cas.”

Lights whirled around the corner, throwing the scene of the accident into sharp shadows and colorings of red and blue. He heard people running towards the cars, seeing if anyone had been thrown out of them, if they were smoking. Dean didn’t care. He just wanted his angel better, laughing at his puns and “slang terms” as he once called them. He wanted to see the life and happiness he saw in those blue eyes once staring back at him again. Dean just wanted his Cas back.

“Son?” Dean turned to look at where the strange voice was coming from. A tall man towering over them both. He instinctively wrapped his arms tighter around Cas, not wanting to give him to the man standing there. “Son, you’re going to have to let me take him. I won’t hurt him. Just let me take his pulse.” Calling over his shoulder about oxygen and a stretcher but Dean wasn’t sure. He looked back at Cas, peacefully lying in his arms.

He turned to the strange man, and nodded. He reached down to feel Cas’ neck, and yelled over his shoulder, “I need the defibrillator stat! Bring oxygen and that stretcher over here! We need to take him. NOW!” Three more people came over, and took Cas from Dean’s arms, loading him onto a stretcher. One messed with his shirt, tearing it open and ignored the buttons falling onto the ground. He immediately began compressions on Castiel’s chest.

Dean turned and emptied is stomach of the bread sticks and whiskey he had consumed an hour before.

“Are you coming with us sir? You aren’t in any shape to drive. Someone will take your car.”

He was being grabbed around the wrist and pulled towards the direction of the ambulance. Someone reached into his suit pocket and grabbed his keys, throwing them at someone somewhere. He followed the EMT into the ambulance and watched as the scene disappeared before him behind metal doors and the start of the vehicle beneath his feet. He grabbed Cas’ hand, rubbing his thumb along his, holding on to everything.

So many people were talking around him, becoming a buzz as he looked at Cas, lying on the stretcher. An oxygen mask was wrapped around his face, his shirt ripped open, his arms and legs torn from the fallen glass that littered the car, and the extensive cut framing the left side of his face.

Before he knew it, he was being moved out of the ambulance and then Cas was too. They were already at the hospital? They ran in through the doors, and were taking him to the E.R. Dean still holding Castiel’s hand.

“Sir, I’m sorry but you can’t go any further.”

To this, Dean turned and glared. He had to go with him; he was the only one there. He felt Cas’ fingers being ripped from his as they ran the stretcher through the doors. “No. I have to go with him. I’m the only one he has.” Dean buried his face in his hands to feel a hand rest against his shoulder. “Okay sir, but you won’t be able to go into the room. You’ll have to wait outside it.” Dean nodded and followed her threw more doors, each hallway seeming like they got longer and longer until she turned into a room and told Dean to wait.

He waited.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

10 minutes.

15 minutes.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

20 minutes.

25 minutes.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

A nurse walked in to the room, Dean immediately rising from the chair and expecting the worse. “Sir? Here is his phone. It was found in his jacket. I don’t know if you know who his family is or if he has any. Could you call them?”

“Yeah. Uh… sure.”

He grabbed the phone from the nurse’s hand and flipped it open. A passcode of course. He tried the last four digits of his number thanking whoever was listening that it worked. He went to Cas’ texts and saw that there were only four people listed: Himself, a person named Gabriel, someone named Balthazar, and Meg. He remembered that Cas mentioned he had two brothers so he called Gabriel first hoping he would pick up.

It began ringing and on the third ring, it was interrupted by a very loud and sarcastic “This better be good Cassy.”

Dean swallowed the sudden lump that grew in his throat.

“Cas? Hello? Did you butt dial me?”

Dean couldn’t say anything.

“Castiel. Seriously, is everything okay?”

“This isn’t Cas. This is his friend Dean.”

“Hiya Dean! Where’s Cassy at?”

“Actually Gabriel, Cas can’t come to the phone…. He won’t be able to for a while. He was on his way to meet me for dinner tonight and- and…” Dean couldn’t finish the rest of the sentence, letting the tears that he has been holding back finally spill over.

“Dean? What the hell happened?!”

“He was in an accident and it’s serious. You need to come to Lawrence. Grab your brother too.”

“Oh my god! What happened?! Where at? Which room?” He began rattling off questions making Dean hold on to the arm of the chair for the support.

“He was in a head on crash and it was bad. We are at Lawrence Memorial Hospital in room 401. Go to the end of the hall, second door on the left. Please hurry.”

They exchanged more information and arranged that Gabriel and Balthazar would be staying at Dean’s apartment until Cas was ready to go home. They would leave as soon as Balthazar came home, Gabe (he said to Dean he preferred this) was already packing while on the phone.

After exchanging numbers, they hung up and Dean slumped in the chair burying his face in his hands.

He was obviously going to stay with Cas until Gabe and Balthazar (he thought) showed up. He wasn’t going to leave his side. The upcoming week was going to be brutal and unpredictable. He would take off work and he would have to give up his trip to see his dad, Sam and Jess. Sam was the one person he wanted to see. The only person that was awake he wanted to see. Sam was the emotional one, the one who wanted to talk things out. When Dean needed to talk and have a chick flick moment, Sam was always there. And ever since Jess came into the picture, so was she.

He flipped open his own phone, hit button one and send.

“Dean?”

“Hey Sammy.”

“Dean. Is everything okay? You don’t sound too good.”

“No Sam. A friend of mine, Cas, was in a head on collision tonight and he isn’t good. So I am going to stay here in Lebanon until his brothers get here. They are going to be staying with me. I’m so sorry Sam. I wish I didn’t have to cancel on you.” New tears began forming but Dean pulled them back, knowing he couldn’t worry Sam any more than he already was.

“Dean, are you okay? Seriously man, you’ve gotta talk to me. You sound like you’ve been through hell and back.”

Dean felt like it. His whole body was tired, his mind too. He just wanted to sleep being curled up next to Cas.

“Sammy, I miss you. I wish I didn’t have to let you down. I want to go home, trust me I do. But I need to stay here with Cas; I just can’t pull myself away from him.”

“It’s okay Dean. I get it. We’ll be keeping Cas in our thoughts. I’ll let Jess know. Right now she is sleeping.”

Dean thought about his soon to be sister-in-law. She was amazing for Sam, she was a big ball of sunshine that could make your worst day better with her laugh and her bouncy blonde curls. He smiled just at the thought of her.

He rubbed his face in his hands and when he turned back to the doorway, he saw a nurse standing, waiting for him to get off the phone.

“Listen Sammy, I gotta go but I will talk to you later. I’ll let you know what’s going on, okay?”

“Yeah, Dean. Okay, talk to you later. Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

Dean shut the phone to the sound of Sam’s laugh. He smiled and looked back to the nurse.

“Sir, Castiel will be coming in shortly. Are you his family?”

Without thinking, “Yes, I’m his boyfriend. I called his brothers and they are on their way here.”

The nurses face fell a little but too soon she had a small smile on her face.

“Okay. Thank you. Would you like to know his list of injuries before he comes in? So you know at least what to look for if and when he wakes up?”

“No he will wake up.” Dean heard the sharpness of his tone and was startled at it himself. “Sorry, just- he will. He is a fighter and usually goes against what people think.”

“It’s okay, sir. But anyways, he has two contusions to his skull: both being on the sides of his head. One was the deep cut on the right side and the left side was the one that knocked him unconscious. His right leg is broken, and his right wrist. Other than that, nothing too great besides cuts and bruises from impact and broken glass. You were brave to get him out of the car like that. If he had stayed in there any longer, he could of hurt his back even more.”

“Even more?”

“Yes, after sitting like that, his back muscles stared to contract, causing his muscles to tense.”

Dean felt his knees go weak again, grabbing onto the chair for support for the third time that night. She was trying to tell him that it wasn’t his fault when it was. He should of picked him up, then Cas wouldn’t be the one laying in the hospital. This was all his fault.

“Okay, thank you ma’am.”

She turned and left, leaving Dean in the small lonely room.

** SPN **

“It’ll be okay, Cas. It’s okay. I’ve got you.”

Cas felt a rough and calloused hand rub against his face, smoothing out something he couldn’t feel. He felt the hand move to the other side of his face, putting pressure on something. It hurt. It all hurt so much. He just wanted to go home. Was this Dean? His mind became at ease instantly thinking of his green-eyed man. He left Dean standing. Castiel instantly became overtaken with worry and sadness thinking that Dean didn’t know.

He had to go find Dean.

Why won’t his leg move? He tried again but nothing. His leg hurt. Bad.

He stopped moving, attempting to go to him. He could not go anywhere.

“…Someone’s always coming around here, trailing some new… kill. I said I seen your picture on a hundred dollar bill. And what’s a game of chance to you is one of real skill.”

A soothing and time-worn voice flooded Castiel with warmth and calmness. It was Dean singing to him. He had never done this before. What happened?

He heard the wonderful voice break and a strange sound escape the source.

“So glad to meet you Angeles.”

Another sob and then something wet was hitting his face. It stung hitting his open cuts. Were they tears? More were falling on his face.

“Castiel, please, come back. I’ve got you, I’m here man. Don’t worry all right? You’ll pull through because that’s what you do. You pull through. Right?”

He had to comfort Dean someway. He heard worry, pain, sadness, and love seeping through the voice. If only he could get his attention.

_“De-…”_

“Cas?! Come on man. Please wake up. I’ve known you for ten days and yet- and yet I need you. I need you Cas.”

_I need you, too Dean. Everything will be okay. I will be fine. You will be okay Dean. We will be okay._

Sudden fog overcame Castiel and he was pulled under.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, another cliff hanger but I hope that you liked/loved it! Let me know what you thought and thank you for reading!!


	5. Listening in Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean sits and waits for Gabe and Balthazar to arrive to the hospital when the Doctor comes in and tries to make a move. The wrong move. He confesses to Cas everything and hope that he doesn't mind.

** SPN **

Dean thought about all the things he could of done to save Cas, but his thoughts were interrupted by someone’s too clean of shoes squeaking against the tiled floor.

He looked up to find the nurse from earlier and- the doctor.

This man was beautiful. He had above-the-shoulder length hair that was dark brown. He had a strong jaw line with just as strong blue eyes. But nothing compared to Cas’. Dean gave him a look-over and felt his face warm with embarrassment. The doctor had been doing the same thing to Dean.

They made awkward eye contact, and the doctor smiled at him. Dean returned it kindly but wanted to know about Cas.

“Is Cas okay? What’s happened? Is he going to his room now?”

“Yes he is. Nothing happened that raises alarm besides what took place during the car collision. As the nurse told you before, he had a broken leg and wrist. He is also unconscious and we are not positive as to when he will wake up.”

Dean sank back into the chair that seemed to be holding him from being a puddle onto the floor. There had to be something they could do. Anything.

“There isn’t anything that can help wake him up?”

“No. It is best that they, if and when, wake up on their own.

Dean kept hearing the word “if” and he didn’t like it. Cas _was_ going to wake up, even if he had to give up his own life.

“Would you like to go see him?”

Dean nods, pulled from his thoughts. He follows the nurse and Dr. Somethingorother into the room. His palms became sweaty and started to shake. He felt like he was going to buckle any second, or run the opposite way. He could feel himself going pale, as he looked upon the bed that held Cas.

Half of his beautiful face was covered in bandages. The right side mainly with the bandages tinted yellow from the iodine and splotches of red. Dean grabbed onto the bed end and made himself look at the rest of him. His right leg was exposed from under the covers and his right arm was slung around his chest, which was exposed and covered with little scratches and bruises. Moving his eyes a little more, he saw a patch of blue come from around Cas’ back and connected into the front. So there was the back damage.

“Cas- I am so sorry….” He stood next to Cas, and held onto his wrist.

“Dean.”

He turned towards the source and found the doctor standing extremely close.

“What?” suddenly feeling very protective of the man lying in the bed. He turned so his body blocked him from view. The doctor was about the same height as him, he may be a little more fit, but Dean could take him if he needed to.

“Listen, I know that this is probably a bad time but I wanted to give you this,” handing Dean a small piece of folded up paper, “and let you know that if you ever wanted to talk or go out for a drink. Just give me a call.”

Dean didn’t know how it happened next but what he knew was that he had his forearm pressed against the doctor’s neck and his body held against the wall with glass on the side.

“You listen and you listen good you sonofabitch. Cas _will_ wake up. And when he does, I won’t even look back at this place. You scum piece of shit.”

Dean looked at him and loosened some of the pressure held against his neck. Which was a mistake.

“I don’t know when or if he will wake up. We have done what we can for now.”

“I will beat you within an inch of death if that means he will live. Do you understand?”

“I’m just sayi-what?!” And with that, Dean’s fist made contact with the glass case next to the doctor’s head internally screaming at himself for even giving this guy a look-over.

Blood and glass fell to the floor as Dean pointed to the door, “Get. Out. Before I actually cause damage that can’t be undone.”

The doctor left and Dean went back to Cas’ bed, plucking out the glass that now was stuck in his hand. “Please wake up Cas.”

….

A while later, after Dean cleaned up his hand, he was sitting in the chair when he heard someone walk into the room. He looked up to find the nurse staring at his hand. He hid it behind Cas, “What’s up?” The nurse drew her eyes away and looked at Dean. “I was wondering if you would like me to show you where the cafeteria is. You have been in the hospital for over 9 hours. Come at least get a drink or coffee.” The concern in her eyes was overwhelming and it took all of Dean to say no. He needed, wanted to stay with Cas. Just in case.

“No thanks. That is really nice of you though. I just- I need to stay with him.” He gave her as a kind of a smile that he could muster. She returned the smile to him and walked out of the room. Leaving Dean alone again.

“Cas, if you can hear me, hope you don’t mind if I talk. Sammy is good at filling awkward silences. My brother, he would love you. He says that someone like you is someone that I need. Don’t know why. Probably because you are responsible, accountable, and just amazing. If only you could meet him. And then there is his fiancé Jess. She is perfect for him. She keeps him grounded and happy and I have never seen him this happy. Not even when we were kids. But I don’t blame him. Our mother died when he was just a baby. He blames himself just like I do. But he was only six months to where I was four. I could have done something. I don’t know. I just feel like if I had called her into my room or something then maybe she wouldn’t have died. My dad would of grabbed Sammy and then her and I would have been outside.”

Dean bowed his head, knowing how stupid he must look talking to himself.

“My dad, you would like him too. Well now, you would. He was one the one who raised Sam and I. He taught us to look out for each other; that we need to, to survive in this world. But the bad thing was I had to grow up and fast. I was an adult at the age of five. I watched Sam, changed him, fed him, and showed him everything that I knew. I worked with him on homework even though he was the one who should have been helping me.” Dean laughed at the small joke. “But we moved around _a lot_ as a kid mainly living off gas station food and in motels. Cheap ones. I could spot a good motel or an untrustworthy one from three miles away.”

Again, he felt weird talking to someone who couldn’t hear him, but he needed to keep from breaking down.

“There is also the Singer and Harvelle family. You’ve met them. Bobby and Ellen Singer and then Jo and Ash Harvelle. They are from Ellen’s first marriage; he died in a hunting accident when Jo and Ash were little. That’s where Jo became such a little pain in the ass. She could whip someone’s ass no problem. She can take care of herself _and_ Ash. Then a couple years back, Bobby and Ellen decided to tie the knot. Jo is a couple years younger than Sam and Ash is about my age. Not sure but close enough. He went to MIT and now works at the shop with us. He is wicked smart with computers, electronics and all that stuff. Jo is going to a community college. And of course, everything she does with baking. Not sure what she is going into though. She mainly works with Ellen at the Roadhouse serving and cooking every night.

Then there is Adam and Charlie. Charlie is like the sister I never wanted. We geek out on stuff together. She likes cosplaying and so do I. We play some war games together too. It’s scary how much we have in common. She works in the shop where Adam, also the same age as Jo, works too. He is like another brother to me. The kid can be a little weird but he is pretty cool.

Cas, I can’t wait for you to meet them. You would love them. Just for you to get to know them would be fun to watch. Ash would probably embarrass you and then Ellen would swoop in and save you from him. I want you to meet them. You know they were all there for me when I came out?”

He took a deep breath and steadied himself. The only people that really knew the story were his brother, Bobby, and John. The rest have only heard bits of it.

“It was senior year, and I had figured out that I wasn’t like the rest of my friends. Sure, I had dated girls and I had talked to them. Hell, I made it to third base with one.” Thinking that Cas wouldn’t know what that meant, “Well we did stuff. Let’s put it that way.

But I wasn’t ever truly happy. I never wanted to _be_ with them. Well then about half way through senior year when I was asked out by this guy named Crowley. College guy. So of course I said yes. No one would find out at school and I wouldn’t have to hide it.

We went out on a date on a Friday night. It was going really well until we went to this party. He started drinking and so did I. But he liked scotch, I liked whiskey. He drank quite a bit that night.”

Dean drew in a shaky breath and continues, not wanting to leave Cas in the dark about his past.

“I made a comment about wanting to go home, that I was tired. He told me that we would in about half hour. I went on with it, talking to a couple of his friends. About an hour later, he comes up to me, all pissed off and yelling. Accusing me of running off with another guy. I had been sitting talking to this girl for the past hour. I looked at her for help, and she left. Not saying a word. He said I looked too happy, that I had been up to something.

He grabbed me by my shirt collar and took me into an empty bedroom. He threw me onto the bed and threw his glass at me.”

Dean rubbed his forehead where the glass had made contact with him. It was hidden behind the short blondish brown hair. Concealed perfectly.

“I tried to fight back and it didn’t work. I tried to wiggle my way out from underneath him but he seemed to enjoy it more. He slapped, punched, and kneed me a couple of times, cracking a rib…. After he was finished, he left me lying on the bed and said that he would come back for me in twenty minutes.”

Dean buried his head in his hands for what seemed the fifteenth time that night.

“I was with him for three years. From that night up until one night when he was so drunk, he passed out. I left, taking his car, and drove back home. Sammy was the only one home and doctored me up. I had a swollen lip from the fight we had the previous night.

I have no one else to blame for that besides me. I could have left. I should have but I stayed because I loved him, or at least thought I did. I was just blind.

And to be honest, I have no idea what made me talk to you that night. I hadn’t talked to a guy since then. Sure I had guys talk to me, asking me out but I would never call them. I didn’t trust them, and I didn’t want to. But there was something about you that was just… different.”

Dean smiled to himself and looked at Cas.

“I was going to kiss you when I walked you back to your car. God, Cas I wanted to so bad. The first night we went out for coffee and pie. When I dropped you off, but I didn’t want to scare you, thinking that was all that I wanted.

I wanted to get to know you. I had all these questions for you, like your family, and what you want to do and what you want in- in a boyfriend…”

Dean felt a hot tear run down his face and he ran his hands over his face. He didn’t care anymore.

“Cas, just get better. Please. I want us to continue getting to know each other. This, right here, is what I want. You and me.”

At that moment, a  nurse walked in with two strange men. He could only guess that they were Gabe and Balthazar. The one with blonde shaggy blonde hair and green eyes, munching on a piece of candy, stepped forward first.

“My name’s Gabe, this is Balthazar,” pointing to the man standing behind him with short blonde hair, and blue eyes wearing a gray t-shirt and black jacket, “We’re Cassy’s brothers.”

“Yeah mate, thanks for taking such good care of him. We tried to get down here as soon as possible. But we had to call work and that.” He had a British accent, but it was mellowed out.

Then it him.

“Shit! I haven’t even called work!” He looked at his watch and saw that he had to be at work in an hour and half.

He excused himself from the room and dialed Bobby’s number.

“Hello?”

“Hey Ellen, it’s Dean. Is Bobby there?”

“Yeah, hun. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah Ellen, thanks. I just gotta talk to him.” He heard rustling through the phone and then a very gruff and old voice say “Hello?”

“Hey Bobby, I won’t be able to make it in today. There was an accident last night with a friend of mine. His family just got here and so I am going to stay with them. They are crashing at my place while they’re here.”

“That’s fine Dean. Take off all the time you need. I will see if Jo wants to come in and work or something. Who was it?”

“You remember Cas from about a week and a half ago? It was him. He was in a head-on collision last night and is unconscious. They don’t know when or if he will…”

“Oh I’m sorry to hear that boy. Is there anything I can do?”

“Not really. Just let me off with a few days?”

“No problem…,” silence from both ends and then, “are you doing okay?”

“Bobby I’m-,” he couldn’t fake it anymore, “I’m not okay. I’m scared Bobby and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to sleep or eat or any of that. I just want him to be okay. I met him eleven days ago and he is having this big of an effect on me! This isn’t normal!”

“Kid, it’s okay to not be okay. All you can do is be there for him and his family.”

“Thanks Bobby. I’m going to try. Okay, I gotta go but I will talk to you later. And thanks again.”

“No problem. Ya idgit.” Dean could hear the smile in his voice, and the care that seeped through it. They both hung up and Dean went back to the room. Gabe and Balthazar were talking about insurance or something and Dean went back to the chair.

“Dean?”

He turned to look at the two guys. “We are going to talk to the hospital about bills and the insurance and that. We will be back in about twenty minutes. You think you can handle?”

He nodded and watched the two guys leave. He leaned his arm against the side of the bed and held Cas’ hand. His head was held up by his hand, and he let his eyes close; opening them every few minutes or so to check on the man lying in the bed. Finally they didn’t open again, hearing his soft snores echo through the room.

** SPN **

Gabe and Balthy were on their way back to the room after being gone for 45 minutes. They were talking about Dean and all that he had done.

“So that was the bloke that Cas was talking about,” said Balthazar as they rounded the corner to Cassy’s hallway.

“He took care of him Balthy. All we can do is thank the man. He was the one who dragged him out of the car.”

“I know he is. I’m glad he found the lad. I am, but I'm worried about Cassy.”

“Cassy will be fine. He’s strong and will go against what the doctor’s say. He likes to rebel, remember?”

Balthazar nodded and leaned against the wall as he watched as Gabe sat in the window seat and pulled a Twix bar out of his jacket pocket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter!!!! Please review, whether it be good or bad, it'll help. Thanks for reading!
> 
> P.S. please forgive the spelling mistakes :D


	6. Going Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean doesn't like being forced to do things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please feel free to review!! I hope you enjoy chapter 6 :D
> 
> Also, sorry about the long wait. These past couple of weeks have been crazy busy!

** SPN **

The following morning, Dean went back to work. It took all Bobby had and more to convince him that he needed to do something besides “sit on his ass and blame himself.” This was exactly what Dean was doing. Siting on his ass and blaming himself for what happened to Cas.  He went through all the reasons why it was his fault every time he looked at Cas “asleep” on the bed. That’s what he had to tell himself that Cas was just sleeping.

He woke in a daze, confused as to why Cas wasn’t next to him. Then he remembered that he was home and that he had to go back to work. He loved work, fixing cars of all sorts but especially the old ones. He had his classic impala that had been given to him by his father on his eighteenth birthday. His baby.

But he didn’t want to do anything. He had barely slept the night before, dreaming of nothing but the car wreckage and Cas lying in his hands then just disappearing into thin air. Dean would wake in a cold sweat and shaking. The first time this happened, he barely made it to the hospital bathroom before spilling the non-existent contents of his stomach.

Every time after that, it was the cold sweat and shaking.

He jumped in the shower, realizing he had two days of work to do when he got back. Jo was driving herself today, which helped Dean not feel so self-conscious. After getting dressed in his regular clothes, he got into his baby and drove away from the small apartment.

….

He pulled into the shop and knew that he had _a lot_ to do. Three cars were lined up, all belonging to regular customers that only allowed him to work on their cars. All three were classics and he knew the most when it came to those.

He walked into the office and dropped into his chair, burying his face in his hands. After a moment, he rubbed his face one last time and turned to look at the pile of paperwork that seemed to have tripled in size in a matter of two days.

Dean got to work, focusing his mind on the words and pen scribbling across the papers in his block writing. His brother Sam used to say that one’s handwriting reflected their personality. Dean’s was smooth, flowing, and very… adult like. To where Sam’s was big, messy, and fun looking. His signature was something to laugh at. It looked like he ate five pounds of sugar, spazzed and lost control of the pen. Dean’s was smooth, the first letter readable and then the rest of the name was small and professional. It reflected their personalities almost perfectly.

A knock rang through the small room causing Dean to jump five inches out of his chair. Grasping his chest, “What the hell?!” He saw that Charlie was looking at him with a shocked face. “Sorry Dean, I just wanted to let you know that Bobby wanted to talk to you.” She left, leaving Dean feeling guilty and sorry. Just what he needed.

He grabbed his jumper and tugged it over his jeans and left the office pulling on his sleeves. He walked in and saw Bobby sitting behind his desk, looking at an old photo. Dean sat down, finally having zipped up his jumper. It smelled of oil, gas and lubricant that brought him home if only for a moment.

“Boy?”

“Yeah Bobby?”

“Are you doin’ okay?”

“Yeah Bobby. I’m fine. Listen, I gotta get back to wo-.”

“Sit down and stay there ya idgit.”

Dean didn’t move a muscle, only to breathe and blink. He listened as Bobby talked.

“Listen son. I know what it’s like to go through something like this. Trust me. When I buried my wife, Jim, Jose, and Jameson became my best friends. But because of your father I pulled out of it because he made me see what was happening around me. Then after your mom died, I thought I lost your father and you too. You both changed so drastically.

It’ll be okay. Seriously. We are all here for you. If anything happe-.”

Dean had heard all he could.

“Bobby, nothing is going to happen. He will fully recover from this. It was a car accident. I know Cas and he _will_ make it through this alive and awake.”

Dean exhaled deeply and looked at Bobby. He had a small smile on his face showing through his gruffy beard.

“Boy, you always seem to surprise even though I’ve known you for what seems like forever. Even though you are so much like John, you have your mother’s care and love and selflessness. But you are also a damn fool,” he held up a finger and Dean closed his mouth and dropped the argument, “because you also need to take care of yourself. You won’t be of any use to anyone if you are tired on your ass and moping around. And you know I am damn right too.”

Dean couldn’t argue because he knew that Bobby was right. He was a fool for running himself down so much.

“Alright, fine. I’ll go get rest.” Dean pushed up off the chair and turned to leave. He heard Bobby mumble under his breath “that’s what I thought.” Dean laughed to himself as he walked out and over to Adam. He knew that Bobby meant well but Cas was his main focus.

“Come on Adam. You and I both get to leave early. Bobby is forcing me to go home and sleep while you be my babysitter.” With that said, him and Adam climbed into his car which purred to life at the turn of the key, and took off down the street.

….

Dean unlocked his door and was already tired. Or at least that’s what he made it look like. Adam yawned and walked over to the couch, propping his feet up on the table after watching Dean to make sure it was okay.

“I’m gonna go get some shut eye. Wake me up immediately if anything happens alright Adam?”

He nodded to Dean and turned towards the T.V. set. Dean went to his room and shut the door. He stripped off his jumper and button shirt, crawled into bed and set his phone alarm for 10 minutes. He would check to see if Adam was asleep.

….

He opened his bedroom door, wincing at the creak it made. He poked his head out to see if he could see Adam. His head was drooped back and a soft snore was escaping his mouth. Dean grabbed his shoes in one hand, shoved his wallet and keys into his pocket, and made his way slowly to the door and watched as Adam sat still on the couch as Dean shut the door behind him.

Sitting on the steps, he pulled on his boots and made his way to the door. Outside, it was raining and Dean ran to his baby, seeming as though she was the only safe haven he had.

Dean was in the hospital parking lot in what seemed like minutes. His room was on the fourth floor, right outside of the elevator. The ride was quick and as soon as the doors open Dean turned the corner to go to Cas’ room and almost ran into the woman standing in the door way.

“Son, you okay?”

“Yes, ma’am. Sorry about that, I didn’t see you there.”

“It’s alright. Are you a friend of Mr. Novak’s?”

Dean felt his heart pick up as he thought about him and Cas being together.

“Yes, I was the one who found the wreckage.”

“Okay. I’m Sheriff Jody Mills. I’m the one working the case. We are trying to figure out what happened.”

“I don’t know how much I can help you. I only found the wreckage because Cas called me when he woke up.”

“That’s more than plenty. It’ll help, trust me. Just tell me what you saw, what you heard, anything okay?”

“Yeah. Well Cas and I…” Dean looked at her and took a deep breath, “we were supposed to meet at this restaurant at around 7:30 that night. He was running late because of work so when quarter to eight came around, I didn’t really get too worried. But when another fifteen minutes passed by, I started to get worried. I called and never got a response. I tried another ten minutes later and nothing. Then I was sitting at the table and my phone rang. It was Cas and when I answered, he didn’t say anything right away. I said his name again and that’s when he said my name and help. That’s when the line went dead. I got into my car and drove to find him. Figuring that if he had taken the main road, someone would of saw it but since I hadn’t been contacted yet I took the back road to find him. And then I found the cars....” Dean shuddered and hung his head, leaning against the door frame for support. He looked back up to see his boyfriend’s chest moving slowly up and down.

“That’s everything?”

“Yeah. You know there is a pub right down the street. Cas doesn’t drink. If once a month.”

“Is it possible that he was texting?”

Dean stared her down, knowing well that his face was getting red but he didn’t care.

“No.”

“Do you have his phone?”

“His brother does. Let me text them to get up here.”

Dean shot out the quick message and turned his attention back to Sheriff Mills.

“Son, all we are trying to do is figure out what happened. I don’t mean to make you upset- what’s your name?”

“Dean Winchester.”

“Okay, Dean. Like I said, I didn’t mean to make you upset.”

Dean nodded his head and looked back at Cas.

“Alright Dean. I’m going to go but here is my card if you or his brothers come up with anything else. Give me a call. And thank you for your time.”

Dean took the card as she left the room. He slipped it in his back pocket as Gabe and Balthazar walked in the room.

“What’s up Dean-o?” Gabe unwrapped a sucker and put it in his mouth.

“Nothing much. I’m supposed to be at home sleeping but I can’t so I’m here.”

He plopped in the seat and leaned his head back.

“So Cas has told us some stuff about you.”

“Oh really. Like what?”

“That you have a brother, that you are a mechanic, love pie, burgers, and beer, and that you fish on occasion when you get the chance. You are going to school to be an auto mechanic and that you live in Lawrence where we do.”

“That pretty much sums up everything.” Dean gave a shaky laugh, not sure whether to be upset or happy that Cas is talking about him to his siblings.

“Yeah he seems to really like you.”

Dean smiled to himself and watched again as Cas’ chest rose and fell.

“I really like him too.”

** SPN **

Adam awoke in a daze, wondering where he was. Then it him that he was at Dean’s apartment. He checked his phone and no texts or calls appeared on the screen.

“Dean?”

Silence rang through the apartment.

“Dean? You asleep still? Man, you must’ve been tired.”

He got up from the couch and made his way to Dean’s room. The door was somewhat opened so he poked his head in.

“Hey Dean, I think I am gonna hea- Dean?!”

The bed was empty with the sheets tossed to one side. His keys and wallet were gone and so were his boots.

“Dammit!”

Adam pulled his phone out and scrolled till he found him and hit send.

“Ya?”

“Bobby! It’s Adam and don’t take this the wrong way but… I lost Dean.”

“What?! How in utter hell did you misplace a person?!” Adam moved his phone away from his ear as Bobby continued to yell through the phone.

“Bobby! I don’t know how but he seems to have up and left. It must have been while I had my eyes shut.”

“I know exactly where he is. We will be there in ten.” The line went dead.

** SPN **

Dean, Gabe and Balthazar continued talking after about random things like work and school, what Gabe did in Lawrence, a little about the families. A sharp knock interrupted the men talking about siblings.

“Mind if I come in?”

Dean looked to find his sasquatch of a brother and the delicate frame of his soon to be sister-in-law outlined by the lights of the hallway. He rose from the chair in a daze, unbelieving that his brother was actually there.

He crossed the room to his brother and was engulfed in a hug, feeling his back crack in one spot.

“Dean…”

“Sammy. You’re here.”

They stayed like that for what seemed like minutes, finally releasing after Gabe coughed and asked Jess her and the younger brothers name.

“Oh sorry! I’m Sam and this is Jess, she is my fiancé.”

Dean watched as Sam gestured to Jess who had a smile of a million watts, which mirrored Sam’s own. Whenever he talked about Jess or was next to her, his face lit and the grin that seemed to hold some power of the sun. His eyes had to brightness to them that radiated over his body. He thought the world of her and then some.

“I’m Dean’s brother. We are the ones that live in Lawrence. Our father John couldn’t make it.” He turned his attention more to Dean now, “He had to work Dean. He said he was sorry he couldn’t make it.”

Dean knew what that meant. His best friends Jack and Jim had him staying behind.

“It’s alright Sammy. You’re here… why are you here again?” Dean smiled at the attempt of a joke but he knew the reason before it came out of his brother’s mouth.

“We came to see if you needed help. You’ve probably been here the whole time, only going home to change quick then come back here. You need to sleep and to eat. And don’t say I’m wrong because you know damn well that I’m right.”

“Sam, I’m fine. Seriously. Gabe and Balthazar,” he motioned to the two men standing by Sam, “are staying at my place so I don’t want to get in their way. I told them to treat it like home. I’m happy you’re here Sammy. That’s all I need. Okay?”

“Actually mate. You haven’t slept in the last two days. The bags under your eyes make you look like the walking dead.” He shrugged his shoulders while looking at Dean then turned to Sam. “He needs to go home. He was there earlier but snuck out on his friend to come here. It’s nice and all but you need to sleep.” With that, Gabe nodded in agreement.

The sound of boots stomping in the hall made them turn to find Bobby, Jo, and Adam running into the already crowded room. Adam spotted Dean in the chair and mouthed “sorry” to him. Dean shrugged, turning his attention to Bobby who looked like he was about to drag him out of the room by his ear.

“What are you doing here boy?”

“I came to check on Cas. That’s all Bobby. I was going to go back home. Swear. That’s why Sam is here with Jess, to come get me.” He moved his hand to Sam’s arm, where Sam looked at Dean like he had been caught red handed. Probably one of the biggest bitch faces he could muster and it took all Dean had to crack a smile.

“Well Sam! I didn’t even see you there! And that’s hard to do since you’ve grown two feet since the last time I seen you.” Bobby grabbed him and pulled him into a hug. Adam and Jo watched awkwardly, not sure where to stand.

“I guess I should introduce everyone. This is Bobby, Jo, and Adam. Adam was the one I escaped from,” Dean scoffed at his little joke and continued, “and these guys are Cas’ brothers. This one is Gabe and this one is Balthazar.” They all exchanged their hellos followed by an awkward silence.

Gabe turned to Dean, “You should go home. We will call you if anything happens okay?”

Sam and Bobby nodded in agreement, giving Dean no choice but to go.

“Okay but you had better call.” Dean let the threat show in his voice, making Gabe laugh.

“No problem, Dean-o.”

….

 When they entered the apartment, Sam ushered him to the shower, telling him that a hot shower would do him some good. He really didn’t feel like arguing so he went, stripping off clothes as he started walking to the bathroom.

Shutting the door behind, Dean took off the rest of his clothing. He turned on the hot water, letting it steam before he stuck a foot in.

It was hot and it wrapped him in comfort, relaxing his muscles against his will. The shower was always the one place he could unwind and think out issues. Going through all the solutions he had in his head, letting the stream of water wash away those that he shouldn’t worry about. It was also a place he could truly be alone.

He wanted to be alone, away from the crowd that was seemingly growing in his living room. But more than that, he wanted to be _alone_ with Cas.

To talk, to know each other, hold hands, have Cas laying against his chest, and for him to slowly lean down and meet Cas’ lips with his own.

_Wow._

Dean could feel himself getting harder by the second thinking about Cas. His blue eyes, black hair, the soft pink lips.

Dean’s body had never reacted this quickly to thinking about someone else, not even his past boyfriends.

He let the water run over his body relaxing him. He couldn’t go out there with a hard-on. Dean shut off the water and wrapped the towel around his waist, brushing his very sensitive area. He groaned. It had been almost a month since he had last had sex and that experience he didn’t want to think about.

Walking into his room, Dean let the towel fall and grabbed his boxers pulling them up to his hipbones. Next his jeans and t-shirt. He left his room and walked into the living room.

Dean was greeted with worried and surprised faces. He gripped the counter next to him.

“What?”

“Dean…” Sam rose from the couch and crossed the room in two strides.

“No… no, no, no. He couldn’t of….

“No! God Dean, no. He’s still alive. Gabe called and said that Cas’ heart is becoming stronger and that he is showing signs of waking up. I’m going to take you to the hospital.”

“Then let’s go!”

Sam grabbed the keys off the counter as Dean pulled on his socks and boots. He bent down and kissed Jess goodbye as Dean nodded at everyone and shutting the door behind them.

….

Dean walked into the hospital and headed straight for the room, the elevator seeming to take longer than usual.

“I’ll be out here okay?” Sam clapped Dean on the shoulder as he entered the room. Gabe and Balthazar were outside talking to the Doctor about him. They met eyes and nodded to each other.

Dean sat down next to Cas, easily as if he had never left.

What he did next surprised him.

** SPN **

Castiel could hear the sounds of the machines wizzing and beeping in his ears. Becoming louder as the lights in the room became brighter.

One sound became clearer than the rest.

“I don’t really know what or how to do this so here it goes. Whoever is listening, I just wanted to say thank you. For uh… saving him. I don’t know what it is but I feel like- like I need him. After what has happened, I ask that he doesn’t remember the wreck. He doesn’t need those images. At least not yet. If he remembers them later, then we’ll deal with it when we get there. But let him get better first…. And that he remember me.”

Castiel opened his eyes and found Dean with his hands covering his face and leaning against the bed. His breaths being sharp and his shoulders shaking.

He heard his heart monitor begin to pick up as he moved his hand.

“Dean…”

Green eyes met his blue ones.


	7. We Need To Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas learns just how much Dean cares for him.

** SPN **

Castiel looked at the man sitting next to his bed. The bags were prominent against the tanned face and red cheeks. But his eyes were as green as ever. Castiel watched the man with worry, seeing his rough lips stretch into a smile. It was gone as quick as it had appeared.

“Cas…”

Castiel watched as tear slipped down the side of Dean’s face, quickly being wiped away by his hand. He went to go wipe it from his face but Castiel learned quickly that he should not be moving. At all.

He sucked in a sharp breath, which was also another mistake. Looking down at himself and saw the damage; cuts and bruised littered every inch of him, braces were engulfing his right arm along with his right leg. He went to prop himself up a little and found that his midriff was also cased with a back brace. Castiel groaned.

“Dean, where am I?”

“At Lebanon Memorial Hospital. Do you know why?” Castiel moved his good arm over his stomach and found more cuts and bruises; a particular gash standing out so prominently against his paled skin.

“What happened, Dean?” He could hear his heart monitor hasten as he discovered more damage done to his body. He knew the answer but he wanted to know _what_ happened.

Dean turned pale and his eyes focused on something that Castiel himself could not see.

“You were in a bad car wreck. I found it after you called me for help. Do you remember calling me?” Castiel could hear how Dean’s voice had grown thick as his eyes continued to focus on something only trapped in his mind.

“Do you remember anything, Cas?”

He closed his eyes as the man beside him, his angel, called him his nickname.

“Nothing. I woke up in your arms, you singing something about angels or angeles. Crying. I wanted to tell you everything was going to be okay, to hold you but I could not move. Everything started going cloudy then went to black.”

Dean’s voice was tight, controlled, when he spoke, “Do you remember what caused the wreck?”

“A man pulled out of that pub and then swerved onto my side of the road. I went over to the other lane to avoid his car and then last minute he went onto the side I was on at that moment and then- then nothing.”

Castiel watched as Dean’s face went pale then red, a vein showing itself on his forehead. His fists grabbed the bed sheets causing his knuckles to whiten.

“Dean, what is it?”

“The guy that hit you, he was drinking and driving! Cas, don’t you see? He caused all of this because he was too fucking stubborn to call a taxi!”

Castiel knew that he should be mad with the other driver but he could not find it in him. He was worried more about the man.

“Did the police find him… in time?”

Dean’s face looked shocked and then was back to focusing on Castiel before he could get a look at Dean.

“Of course they did. But by the time they would have started questioning the accident, the alcohol would’ve been out of his system.”

Castiel reached across to Dean’s hand, which was taking more sheets in it the more he talked about the accident. When he touched his smooth pale skin to the man’s tanned roughed hand, the muscles loosened, smoothing out the back of his hand.

“Dean, listen to me. It will be okay. I will be fine and back to as normal as I was before the crash.”

They met eyes, locking onto one another. Castiel searched the grass green eyes for a shred of ease or happiness and only found worry. But the action next never showed in the green eyes.

Dean leaned forward in his chair and pressed his lips to Castiel’s forehead. A breath escaped Castiel’s lips as Dean stayed there. He pulled away and pressed his own forehead to Castiel’s.

Castiel opened his mouth to ask what that was for when a sharp knock made both men jump.

“I hope I’m not interru- Cassy! You’re awake!” Gabriel ran to his brother’s bedside. Castiel felt relief and happiness wash over him, relaxing his body even more.

“Hello, Gabriel.”

“How are you feeling? I need to go get Balthazar and the doc. One sec bro.”

Gabriel left the room as fast as he had come in. He reappeared with Balthazar and who Castiel guessed was the doctor. They did an examination of him, careful with his leg and arm, making sure that his cuts were healing properly.

“I am going to keep him for another 24 hours. He is healing better than I expected. After tomorrow, he will be able to go home.” He looked at Dean and nodded. Dean looked away as if he had not seen the action.

After the doctor left the room, a very tall and broad shouldered man entered the room. He had longish hair that was a dark brown and bright hazel eyes. He had to be at least 6’5”.

“What was that about Dean?” Castiel was confused as to why Dean would “blow off” the doctor, the man who had helped heal Castiel. “Nothing Cas, I’ll explain later. Promise.” Dean leaned forward and surprised Castiel with a kiss on the forehead. He felt himself relax and trust that Dean would keep that promise.

“Sam! This is Cas. Cas, this is my brother, Sam.”

Sam nodded to Castiel, “hey, Cas. How are you feelin?”

“Better now, thank you Sam.”

“That’s good. Let Dean know if you need me to do anything alright?”

“Again, thank you Sam. I wil.”

“Cool. Okay Dean, I am gonna head back to your place and let everyone know that Cas is awake and okay. I’ll see you there.”

“Thanks Sam.”

“Jerk.”

“Bitch.” Castiel watched the brother’s exchange these “harmful” words and saw the smiles that appeared on their faces. Sam left the room chuckling to himself.

Gabe stood in confusion but was brought back by Castiel turning to look at him. But Dean was the one to break the silence first.

“Oh! Also, Cas, Gabe and Balthazar are staying at my apartment because yours is too small. And I’m not leaving your side. Sam and Jess came to help with everything so they are staying with Bobby. You remember Bobby?”

“Yes, I do, Dean.”

“Okay. I’m goin’ to stay right here.” Dean turned his attention to Gabriel and Balthazar, “are you two staying here tonight too?”

“Of course Dean-o! We have to stay with our darling little brother here.” Gabriel smiled and winked at Castiel. Starting to pull a candy bar from within his coat pocket, “besides you’ve done enough; let us be with our brother for a little bit.” Balthazar smiled and made a scoffing noise. “You may want to go get some coffee and food mate, you are turning a bit pale.”

Castiel watched as Dean rose from his chair with his hand still in his. Castiel gripped onto him, refusing to let go. Dean looked down and smiled, “I won’t be long. I promise,” as he dipped down a final time and kissed him, this time on the corner of his mouth.

Dean left the room after exchanging words with Balthazar. Castiel watched as the strange yet wonderful man left the room. Gabriel and Balthazar crossed the small room over to their brother’s bed.

“What did Dean ask you?”

“Nothing, just told us something.” Balthazar smiles as he looked down at his youngest brother. “How are you feeling? Want us to do anything for you?” Castiel could hear the sarcasm drip from his voice as Balthazar asked the last question.

“No I am quite alright. Thank you anyway.”

“Oh, Cassy, don’t be that way. He’s just havin’ some fun. Besides, you could use a good laugh after sitting in this bed for so long. When was the last time you laughed or even pulled a prank?” Again, Gabriel pulled a snickers bar out of, from what seemed like, thin air.

Castiel thought of the last time he actually had laughed and it had been with Dean, when Jo had thrown the dish rag at him. He felt his face break into a small smile and thought of the view he had that night.

“Yeah, I was only trying to be a nice brother, but my heart will go on. Bloody awful movie…” the last bit being mumbled to himself more than the two men in the room.

“Okay, Cassy, you need to get some sleep. The doc said!” Gabriel laughed and turned to leave the room. “We’re going to go get some dinner and then we will be back later. Dean should be back soon. God knows, he hasn’t left your bedside since you got here.” The two men walked out, leaving Castiel to his own thoughts. He leaned back onto his pillow and shut his eyes.

_Was that actually true? Had Dean refused to leave my bedside? He has a job and other responsibilities. I am just another person so what is the significance of me that would cause him  to act this way? I have to ask Dean what happened and why he-_

A sharp rap on the door pulled Castiel from his thoughts and looked up to see Dean standing by the door.

“Hello, Dean.”

“Hi, Cas. Shouldn’t you be sleeping? I saw Gabe in the hall.”

“How long have I been unconscious Dean?”

“Three days.”

“I have been asleep for three days. I believe that I will be fine to stay awake for another hour.”

Dean smiled as he took his spot next to Castiel.

** SPN **

He took his usual spot in the chair next to Cas, which now seemed conformed to his butt. He looked up at him and was greeted with a worried and confused face. He was doing this head tilt thing that made him look like a lost puppy. Even more surprising was that Dean found that kinda hot.

“Why are you here Dean?”

_What?_

Dean was _not_ expecting that. His mind was truly blank. He bowed his head to avoid the smolder of a look that was being given to him right now by the man who was bed ridden. And he was intimidating Dean!

He had an answer but couldn’t bring himself to say it.

“Have you slept at all Dean? Even for twenty minutes, have you closed your eyes and rested?”

Again, Dean couldn’t answer.

“Did you eat today? Or yesterday for that matter? Have you taken care of yourself? If you have not noticed Dean, I am stationed in a hospital of nurses and doctors who are being paid to take care of me. You _need_ to take care of yourself Dean because what good are you going to be if you cannot function? I want you here, I do, but I want you to feel good and to be healthy.

Do not practically drain yourself of energy for me. You are more important.”

He couldn’t listen anymore.

“No.”

“No what?”

“No, I haven’t slept. I’ve been here with you Cas, sitting right next to your bed, never leaving. I couldn’t bring myself to leave. I blame myself for you getting into that accident. I should have picked you up, then we wouldn’t be here. We could be at home, watching a movie, or holding each other. But we are here, you are in pain, and it is my partially my fault because I wasn’t there to help! I should have been there when you were in the accident. I could have protected you, or taken the wheel, or something! Cas, don’t you get it? I want to be here with you, broken or not.”

Cas looked as if he had been struck. His eyes had glazed over, watching Dean who was now pacing the room.

“Castiel, I could have lost you. You don’t get it. I’ve become interested in you, more than interested. I don’t think I could leave you if I wanted to or if you wanted me to.”

Dean went back to his blue-eyed man. He took his hand, “I don’t want this to be something I screw up. I want this, what we have, to last.”

He screwed up his face and then decided the best way to say it.

To not say it at all.

Dean leaned forward, slow, waiting for Cas to turn away or to say no. But he never did. Dean was close enough he could hear Cas’ breathing halt as he realized that Dean wasn’t going to stop until something made him stop.

Dean’s lips met Cas’ and he stopped, again waiting for Cas to push him away. But he didn’t. Their mouths pushed against each other, Dean testing his boundaries. He flicked his tongue against Cas’ bottom lip, making a moan escape from Cas. Cas’ mouth opened slightly and Dean slid his tongue against Cas’ lips. Dean felt a something sharp graze his lip only to feel Cas bite down on it. He couldn’t stop the sound that came from him and felt Cas smile beneath him.

“Maybe we should save this for another time Dean. Maybe when we are home.”

Dean couldn’t argue with him because if someone walked in, that was going to be very hard to explain.

“Fine. I guess I can wait.” But what was making his pants tighter, may not be able to wait.”

Cas smiled, “good night, Dean.”

“Night, Cas.”

The rest of the night passed without excitement. Shortly after Cas fell asleep, Dean fell asleep with Cas’ hand in his.

….

The next morning before Cas is awake, Dean goes home to move furniture around and do laundry. Everything was a mess. He would have to do grocery shopping too, but that could wait for after they got Cas home.

Home. The word made Dean smile.

After taking out the garbage and making sure everything was “Cas friendly”, he went back to the hospital to meet Gabe and Balthazar to get him checked out.

Dean walked up just as Balthazar was signing a few papers. “Is everything ready then?”

“Yeah, all we have to do is get him in the car then.”

“Then let’s go. I’m ready to get out of this awful place.”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

They made their way to the room where they found a young nurse helping Cas into a wheelchair and telling him about his medications.

“Thank you ma’am.”

Gabe was giggling as he grabbed the handles on the chair and started to push him down the hallway.

“What are you laughing at?”

“Oh nothing. Just that the nurse was flirting with Cas, and he had to let her down. And then he precedes to fall out of the bed.” By now, Dean though Gabe was going to bust a gut as Balthazar was starting to laugh too. The only one who wasn’t laughing was Cas.

“Oh lighten up. It happens to the best of us.”

“But it seems it happens to me the _most_.” Cas actually seemed embarrassed. They were at the car now, Dean went to go lift Cas out of the wheel chair but he held up his hand. “No Dean. Let me do this.”

He pulled himself up, but then soon was falling back over. Dean knew what was going to happen as he slowly watched Cas. He wrapped his arms around his waist and shoulders, holding him in his arms as he helped him regain his balance.

“I gotchya.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

He sat him inside the car and the other brothers were already in the back seat. Dean roared the car to life and they took off for home.

….

They pulled up to the front of Dean’s apartment, and suddenly he thought _the elevator is broke. And I live on the fourth floor._

 Dean braced himself for what he knew was going to happen. Gabe and Balthazar grabbed the suitcases while Dean grabbed Cas. He wrapped his good arm around him neck, lifting him only slightly.

“Dean! What are you doing?”

“We have to get you up to my apartment somehow, Cas. And I am _not_ letting you what you call ‘climbing’ those stairs when I can just carry you.”

“But Dean, you cannot possibly car- Dean!”

“I gotchya. Don’t you trust me?” He felt the small smile show on the surface of his face as he watched Cas look at the ground. Dean watched as Cas gulped and turned to look back at his brothers. The smooth and yet prominent muscle stretched the more he turned his neck, causing Dean to want to kiss and make it stretch in all the right ways.

“Of course I do, Dean. I do not trust gravity.”

“I know. But it won’t be able to mess with you while I have you.” He smiled again and kissed Cas’ hand that was sitting on Dean’s chest. He was sure that he heard a murmured “get a room” come from behind him.

They were already on the third floor with only two more stair cases to go, each consisting of eight steps. He had to admit the Cas was a little heavy but if he could show off just a little, it was worth it.

And Dean’s front door appeared in front of them in no time. He sat down Cas and unlocked the door, then turned to grab his arm again and lead him into the apartment.

“Welcome to my home, Cas. I’ll show you what room is yours.” Dean pulled/pushed him into his room (which was also the one Dean was going to be sleeping in) and gave him the grand tour.

“This is the bathroom, we’ll have to share, and then the bed of course, some of your clothes that I have washed and we already went through the kitchen/living room/dining room. It’s nothing fancy, but I like it.”

Cas turned to Dean as best as he could, “I love it Dean. It’s quite and quaint and you. It’s perfect.” He ran his hand over Dean’s sheets, looking almost new since they hadn’t been slept in in almost three days.

“You need to get some rest Cas, you’ve had a long day.”

“Stay with me.”

This caught Dean off guard.

“What?”

“I want you to lay with me Dean. I have had you sitting at my bedside for now four days and I want you there now. I do not want anything different. And you need sleep as much as you will deny it.”

“Cas…”

“Please, Dean.” Cas’ eyes melted into a sea of blue and greys, overcome with a want that only Dean seemed to be able to help.

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

Dean helped take off Cas’ shoes and jacket, helping him under the covers, and fix the pillow.

** SPN **

“Please, Dean.” Castiel looked at him, thinking about everything that had happened and how Dean seemed to be there through it all.

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

Dean was moving across Castiel, taking off his shoes and jacket, helping him under the covers, and fix the pillow.

Dean laid next to him, the strong arms wrapped around Castiel’s waist as he settled on the bed. After the past couple of days, the hospital, coming to Dean’s apartment have been lalmost blurry. Meeting Dean, the late nights of texting and talking, and the dreams that all seemed so real. Castiel had never felt more at home than within Dean’s arms. He felt like he could finally breathe deep. It did not take long for Castiel himself to drift off listening to the light snores coming from the man lying beside him.

 **So,what did you guys think? Chapter 8 will be up soon. Life has been getting in the way of me writing.  But thank you for reading and please please review! Any and all are welcome**. :D


	8. Dinner Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo sorry that it has taken forever but I recently had surgery so I've been sleeping a lot and also just a lot of other things in life have taken priority :( I hope you all enjoy chapter 8 and hope to have chapter 9 posted soon!!
> 
> Thanks all again for reading :D

** SPN **

Almost two weeks had passed since Castiel had been “home” from the hospital. He was still staying with Dean and he did not mind at all. He met Dean’s brother formally and his fiancé and then hung around the apartment with his brothers and Dean’s brother. They caught up and learned about each other. In the short amount of time that Sam and Castiel knew each other, he had grown to like the man. Although he had the height and football player like stature to him, he was rather a... a goof ball as Dean had put it. He had the personality of a college kid who loved to have fun and mess around and he was quite clumsy. He tripped over the same chair three times, and one time falling into Jessica, or Jess, as Castiel had been instructed to call her, who seemed to almost expect it from him.

Along with learning about Sam, he also saw the relationship that the two brothers had and just how close they were.  Dean had talked about how he practically raised Sam after their mothers passing and their father had become a drunk and was gone a lot for work. He also told Castiel about one of his proudest moments as a brother. When Dean was teaching Sam how to walk, their father had just come home from a business trip and after Sam crawled to him, he saw Dean and then he gradually got up and took his first steps towards Dean. When he talked about Sam like that, his eyes lit up and a smile overcame his face. Castiel admired Dean and was somewhat envious of the relationship because he did not have one even similar to theirs. The three brothers were close because they were the only family that they had but that did not become that way until they were late teens. By then, they had already developed their own relationships and personalities.

Another thing about their relationship was the way they moved. They almost seemed to synchronize to each other whenever in the same room. And it was not even in the same room. They seemed to know when the other one was in trouble or in pain. When Sam tripped over the table and hit his knee, Dean was in the bedroom and dropped what he was doing. It was as if he knew that Sam was hurt. It was something that Castiel had never seen but everyone around them overlooked; as if they were all used to it. Dean had said that they were close but Castiel had never realized just _how_ close.

They stayed up talking through the night that Sam had stayed at the apartment. Jess had stayed with Jo for some girl time and prepare for the wedding. Both Sam and Jess told Castiel one night at dinner that he had to be there “because it was going to be a lot of fun with dancing and karaoke”. This thought scared Castiel a small bit because the thought of being with someone for that long that was as nice and simple and caring as Dean sent him into a spiral of guilt. It must of shown because Dean grasped his hand under the table and showed him one of his small smiles that seemed to make Castiel’s body relax almost completely. His cheekbones would become more prominent, his cheeks and lips would be pink, and his eyes shined the color of the queens crown emeralds.

Now everyone was gone, Sam and Jess have left a week previously, and Gabe and Balthazar leaving only 3 days ago. He had to get back to the shop in Lawrence. Now Dean and Castiel were the only ones left. Dean had returned to work the week that Sam and Jess left claiming “it gives him something to do”.  Every night at six, he would come home, make dinner, and help Castiel with the physical therapy he was instructed to do by the doctor. Then on Friday’s he would order in and watch whatever movie Castiel wanted. It was their own date night, something that they could be together and not put stress on Castiel’s knee and arm. The knee was just in a brace now, having healed quite fast and getting better every day with the physical therapy. His arm was the only thing serious. It was his wrist, which meant that his lower arm was in a cast and slung around his shoulder. They were going to the Doctor’s that day to see if the cast could come off and just wear a brace that attached to the sling. Castiel did not want anything more.

At that moment, Dean walked through the door, shutting it softly, and walking over to Castiel pushing his lips against his forehead.

“Hey, how was your day?”

Castiel smiled at the kiss and the question he was asked every day and gave the same answer,

“It was thrilling. I went on a trail through the woods and found a hidden cave.” He could practically hear Dean’s eyes rolling in his head. Then the smell of food wafted through the small apartment and made Castiel close his eyes and breathe deeply. The most he had had that day was a small bag of chips and a sandwich. He was trying this whole cooking thing but now that he was temporarily staying with Dean, and it seemed like he belonged in a restaurant, nothing tasted as amazing as what Dean made. Everything melted in his mouth and the flavors made him salivate just thinking about the smells and tastes that come from the small seventy-five square foot kitchen.

“I picked us up some Chinese food and then once we are done eating, we will leave to go to the doctor’s. Sound good?” By the time Dean turned around to find Castiel attempting to get up from the couch and it was not going as planned. He felt arms wrap around his waist and lift him from the couch and he put all of his weight onto Dean.

“Thank you, Dean. And Chinese food does sound quite appetizing.” He heard a small chuckle and a sigh escape the man’s lips as he lifted Castiel onto the stool and helped him set up his plate.

They dug in, both quite hungry, and both done with their food within minutes and stuffed full of delicious food. Dean reached across the table and held Castiel’s hand. He stroked the small scars that now covered his hands with his calloused thumb.

Castiel looked at Dean whose face was thoughtful and quaint. However, before he could ask what he was thinking about, a small smile appeared on his face and the green eyes looked up to Castiel, “are you ready to go to the doctor’s?”

He nodded and was nervous to find out if he could get rid of this awful bulky brace. He wanted to walk without asking for assistance and do things on his own. Although he would never admit that he enjoyed getting help from Dean because the strong arms wrapped around him was his favorite feeling in the world.

They were making their way to the door, Castiel leaning against the door while Dean slipped on his shoes and help Castiel put on his one. When he walked down the apartment stairs, it sounded as though a bowling ball was being rolled down very slow, thumping as it went. It never ceased to make Dean chuckle.

….

They pulled up to the hospital, walking in, and sitting in the waiting room for what seemed like an hour before a nurse came out telling them that the doctor was ready. They looked at each other and nodded, Dean holding Castiel’s hand all the way.

Dean helped him onto the bed and sat in the corner flipping through a magazine. He would make a disapproving noise when he read gossip and laugh at the fashion portion. Castiel watched his caretaker and boyfriend with loving eyes when the doctor came. He completely avoided Dean and looked only at Castiel.

“Hello, Castiel. How have you been?”

“Everything has been fine. Dean has made sure that I have been taking my medicine and keeping it iced along with being elevated. The cuts are all healing except for one, the one with the stitches. Also, I have been getting small headaches that seem to last for hours on end. Is that because of trauma?” Castiel saw Dean wince at the description of the stitches.

“Good, glad to hear that the rest is going well. Make sure you thank Dean for all that he has done.” Dean did not crack a smile, and a sense of tightness was evident in the doctor’s voice as he made the comment. “Let’s take a look, we can do a re-check of your head scans but I didn’t see any swelling the last day you were here. Would you like to do another scan?”

“No, it’s fine. Could it be from something in my back or neck?”

“It can be. I recommend that you go see a chiropractor and maybe he can set you right. Other than that, it looks like you are okay to go without the brace for an hour or so at the time. Nothing longer, make sure that you ice it, too; twenty minutes on and forty minutes off. Continue with the pain medicine as needed but don’t overdo it. I’m sure that you won’t have a problem with that. Thank you gentlemen and call if you need anything but as of now, you are in the clear.” With that said, the doctor left the room without a second glance.

Castiel turned to Dean with a confused look but all he saw was Dean smiling, beaming as bright as the light bulbs on the ceiling.

“Hear that Cas? You’re in the clear!” He helped Castiel off the table and out the door. They were heading to the car when Dean said something that took both him and Castiel off guard.

“We are going to celebrate tonight. We’re gonna go on that date and we are going to have fun. Then maybe we can go on a walk since I know you like the park up town. I guess I can bare the outdoors for you.” A wink made Castiel go weak in the knees and hold onto the car for support.

“Thank you, Dean. That would be marvelous.” He could not help the smile that stretched across his face that echoed the one on Dean’s face. A blush worked its way up Dean’s neck and Castiel could only wonder what that was from.

“Yeah, cool.”

** SPN **

They sat in the room, waiting for this doctor to come in. Dean didn’t really want to see him but Cas needed him in that room with him. He picked up a magazine and flipped through it, tsk-ing at all the gossip and laughing at what the tabloids called “fashion”. It was ridiculous what they considered fashionable.

The doctor entered the room and avoided Dean’s eye contact completely. He didn’t know whether to breathe a sigh of relief or to be offended. Either way, he was there for Cas.

“Hello, Castiel. How have you been?”

“Everything has been fine. Dean has made sure that I have been taking my medicine and keeping it iced along with being elevated. The cuts are all healing except for one, the one with the stitches. Also, I have been getting small headaches that seem to last for hours on end. Is that because of trauma?” Dean couldn’t help the wince that escaped him when the images of Cas caught in the car, knocked out cold, came full force back to him. It was something that he would have no problem forgetting. He could handle cuts and stuff like that, he’s had to sew himself up once or twice at work, but seeing Cas like that sent shivers down his spine.

“Good, glad to hear that the rest is going well. Make sure you thank Dean for all that he has done.” Dean did not crack a smile, and a sense of tightness was evident in the doctor’s voice as he made the comment. “Let’s take a look, we can do a re-check of your head scans but I didn’t see any swelling the last day you were here. Would you like to do another scan?”

“No, it’s fine. Could it be from something in my back or neck?” Dean internally sighed relief as he heard that it wasn’t head trauma from the accident. As much as Castiel reassured him that it was _not_ Dean’s fault, he still somewhat responsible like he could have been there to stop it or to prevent it.

“It can be. I recommend that you go see a chiropractor and maybe he can set you right. Other than that, it looks like you are okay to go without the brace for an hour or so at the time. Nothing longer, make sure that you ice it, too; twenty minutes on and forty minutes off. Continue with the pain medicine as needed but don’t overdo it. I’m sure that you won’t have a problem with that. Thank you gentlemen and call if you need anything but as of now, you are in the clear.”

Dean felt a million watt smile slip onto his face, feeling as though he had slept with a hanger in his mouth. Cas was going to be okay, he was on the road to getting better.

“Hear that Cas? You’re in the clear!” Cas smiled back at him and Dean helped him off the table and out of the hospital, to the car. What Dean thought of next was something that surprised him and he could tell that it surprised Cas as well. “We are going to celebrate tonight. We’re gonna go on that date and we are going to have fun. Then maybe we can go on a walk since I know you like the park up town. I guess I can bare the outdoors for you.”

“Thank you, Dean. That would be marvelous.” A smile appeared onto Cas’ face that mirrored Dean’s own; butterflies seemed to come out of nowhere and flutter his stomach, along with a blush that he could tell was working his way up his neck to his cheeks.

“Yeah, cool.”

….

After getting home and getting ready for the date, Dean was sitting in the kitchen waiting for Cas to get his butt out there. He was taking forever when the bedroom door opened and Cas walked, well hobbled, out to the kitchen and opened his arms. He was wearing a navy suit that fit his legs so well; a white shirt that showed off just how lean and muscular he is. Dean felt blood rush south and he immediately moved his arms to help hide it.

“Better?”

“Uh… yeah. Definitely.”

Cas smiled at Dean and made his way over to him. They left the apartment and made their way to the car. The ride was filled with small talk, Cas basically complaining about not being able to drive anywhere do to the pain meds or not being able to go to work. Dean knew that Cas felt bad for “living” in his apartment basically rent free. And truth be told, Dean didn’t mind the least. He was happy to be helping Cas and to come home to a familiar face instead of the empty furniture. The thought of asking him to move had crossed his mind a few times but he was afraid that it would be moving too fast for Cas. He didn’t want him to feel like he _had_ too. But with Cas getting better, he would be going back to his apartment soon and he would go back to coming home to an empty couch and a cold bed. Dean didn’t want anything more though except for Cas to stay with him for as long as he could.

“Dean?”

He was pulled into reality with Cas looking at him with his famous head tilt and worried expression.

“Wha..?”

“You passed the restaurant Dean. About a block back.”

“Oh, oops. Must of not been paying attention.” He blew it off but he felt bad for worrying Cas. He did a U-turn which earned an eye roll from the passenger and pulled into the parking lot. He climbed out of the Impala and went around to open the door for him. Cas was surprised but Dean smirked at him which got him a slap on the hand and Cas attempting to get out of the car. Attempting.

By the end of it, Dean had helped him out and walked him into the restaurant. Dean told the waitress that they were celebrating tonight so a bottle of wine was in order. Cas shot Dean a pained look, bordering on flattered, and he laughed. They sat at the table, looking over the menus.

“Why did you get a bottle of wine Dean? Those are expensive.”

“Because I’ve been putting money aside here and it’s for splurges. Tonight is a splurge and you get whatever you want.”

“Dean, I cannot possibly-.”

“Cas, please.” What he did next was deadly. He unleashed puppy dog eyes that he used on every date at least once in the night. They usually got him whatever he wanted.

“Fine, Dean. You know that is not fair.” Dean laughed at that and went back to his menu. Seeing that the burgers were five star rating, he knew exactly what to get. In perfect time, too.

“What can I get you gentlemen tonight?” The waiter was a cute girl who looked like she flirted with anything that walked and looked like man. Dean never took his eyes of Cas.

“I want the bacon cheeseburger with a baked potato. Cas?”

He stumbled when he met Dean’s eyes.

“I will have the same but with a side of the vegetable mixture please.”

“Those will be out soon. And here is your bottle of wine.” She winked at Dean who again didn’t pay attention. She left the bottle and sulked away.

“I think you are hurting her Dean.”

“What?”

“She was flirting with you and you did not even look at the poor girl.”

“I don’t want to look at her. Just you.”

His face slowly turned red, apparent even under the dim candle lighting. Dean chuckled and started tearing apart the bread on the table.

The time waiting for their dinner was spent with small talk; more about school, embarrassing stories, and family. Dean even spilled his deepest secret to him.

“I am going to tell you something that you must never tell anyone. Not even Sam knows about this.”

“Of course, Dean.” Cas’ face had never looked more intrigued and worried at the same time.

“Once, in high school, I was at this party and we were all pretty drunk. Well, to pass the time we were all playing truth or dare. Then it came to my turn. Being the brave punk that I am, I picked dare. I still wish to this day that I didn’t but anyways, I was dared to wear a pair of girls’ underwear. I thought, “Fine, can’t be all that different than men’s right?” Well I was wrong. They were pink satin panties…. Completely different from men’s. But you know the weird part? I kinda liked it.”

Dean then winked at Cas which caused him to bow his head and cough. He lifted his head back up and what he said next surprised Dean into shock so bad he didn’t realize the waitress had arrived.

“Maybe I will try them on too.” He felt his mouth open and then when the waitress coughed to get his attention, he closed it and shot a smile her way.

“Thank you.” And just to get his mind off the man sitting across from him, he winked. She left with a small “enjoy,” and giggled, walking off almost in a daze.

Dean couldn’t turn his attention back to the man with blue eyes because he knew that he was already dangerously close to having excuse himself to the bathroom. Instead, he dug into the burger and baked potato, smothering the potato in cheese, more bacon, and sour cream. He was almost half through his burger when he felt someone staring at him. He lifted his eyes to meet blue ones that seemed to almost reach his soul. He wiped his mouth and sat his burger down.

“Yes?”

“Did my comment about wearing the panties make you uncomfortable, Dean?”

The cough/laugh that escaped him captured the attention of the table by them and the table next to that.

“Uh, no, Cas. It just caught me off guard. Trust me, I would be very okay if you decided to do that.”

“Okay, Dean.”

That was all Dean could think about in the back of his mind as he continued to talk with Cas about different things throughout dinner until the bill came. Cas went to pull his wallet out but found it missing.

“Don’t bother looking for it. I hid it so you wouldn’t be able to pay for anything.”

“Dean, that is childish. I can pay for my own me-.”

“When I say that I am taking _you_ on a _date_ then _I_ am taking _you_ on a date. Which means I pay.” A smile played on his lips as Cas folded his arms and sat back in the chair. The waitress took the bill, looking hurt, and thanked them. Dean looked at the back of the copy he had and found the girls number with a smiley face. The girl didn’t even notice.

The men walked out to the car and Dean drove them to the park where they walked to the closest bench and sat, looking up at the stars.

“Sometimes, Sammy and I would go for a ride at night when dad was on one of his drunken rampages and just stare up at the stars. We would spend hours out in the middle of a field and watch. I remember one time we saw two shooting stars in one night. I made a wish that him and I could escape, get our own place and just get away from Dad.

Then two weeks later, we both got our acceptance letters to school, packed up, and left. Dad took it pretty hard but he’s gotten better.”

“I want to know more about you, Dean. You rarely ever open up.”

“Never have been able to. I don’t know why.”

“But you can with me. You can trust me, Dean.”

Who knew such simple words could bring up the question that Dean has been pondering all night and almost for a week now? He just had to ask.

“Cas, I know that we’ve been dating for a short while but you practically live with me anyways.”

“Dean-.”

He expected to the worse but, “Will you move in with me?”


	9. The Truth Comes Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas finds Dean's phone and reads something he doesn't like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!! I love hearing what you think, whether it be something I need to fix or just that you liked/ didn't like it :) Thanks for reading and enjoy!

** SPN **

The men walked to the car, Castiel more hobbling, and then Dean drove them to the park where they found the nearest bench and sat.

“Sometimes, Sammy and I would go for a ride at night when dad was on one of his drunken rampages and just stare up at the stars. We would spend hours out in the middle of a field and watch. I remember one time we saw two shooting stars in one night. I made a wish that him and I could escape, get our own place and just get away from Dad.

Then two weeks later, we both received our acceptance letters to school, packed up, and left. Dad took it pretty hard but he’s not as bitter about it now.”

Castiel could not help the smile that crept along... Dean never opened up. Barely even with Sam, the one he watched grow up.

“I want to know more about you, Dean. You rarely ever open up.”

“Never have been able to. I don’t know why.”

“But you can with me. You can trust me, Dean.”

Then Dean seemed to grow more wary. He fidgeted on the bench and then messed with his fingers.

 “Cas, I know that we’ve been dating for a short while but you practically live with me anyways.”

He knew what was coming.

“Dean-.” He did not want him to make a decision if he did not have to. He knew that Dean was reserved.

 “Will you move in with me?”

Castiel sat on the bench. He could not believe that Dean was putting himself out there and letting a wall come down for a man he had only known for a short while.

“Dean…”

Tears started to swell in Dean’s eyes and he hung his head low; coughing to cover up the mumbling of insults to himself. If only he knew.

“Dean, look at me. Please.”

Castiel grabbed Dean’s head and forced him to turn it towards him, resting both hands on his cheeks. He smiled and kissed Dean. A slow kiss and was met with reserved lips. He pulled back to find Dean’s eyes closed and lips parted.

“I want to move in with you Dean. I was hoping you would ask me soon so I didn’t have to start paying rent.”

Castiel watched as in one fluid motion, his head picked up and his arms wrapped around Castiel’s waist to lift him off the bench into the air, turning in circles. He felt his feet hit the ground and met with a passionate kiss that seemed to lift Castiel back up.

After a moment, he let go and sat Castiel back down on the bench. He looked him in the eyes, worry etched onto his face; something that almost seemed permanent.

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes, Dean. I am positive.”

A grin that could light up the entire West Coast spread across Dean’s face.

“Let’s go home.”

** SPN **

Dean’s heart swelled when he heard Castiel say yes. Everything seemed to be falling into place. He would make plans to move him out of his apartment with the help of Adam, Bobby, and Jo. Deciding that he would talk to them at the shop in the morning, he rolled over in bed and wrapped his arm around Cas’ waist and felt him wiggle closer to him; managing to hit Dean’s shin with his boot, a grunt coming from his mouth and a small sorry filling the dark room. He laughed and closed his eyes. He finally felt happy.

….

The next morning Dean’s hand fell onto an empty bed, panic rising through him making him jerk awake. Then he was hit with a smell that filled the small apartment, making it seem more like home. Something like bacon and- and French toast?

Shaking his head for clarity, he walked into the kitchen/dining room to find Cas hobbling between the fridge and sink, then to the oven and back. He was singing something to himself but Dean couldn’t bring himself to interrupt so he listened.

_“Only fools rush in…_

_But I can’t help falling in love with you._

_Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?”_

Dean recognized the lyrics and was stunned by Cas for knowing them; singing them. They continued drifting down the hall to Dean.

“ _Some things are meant to be._

_Take my hand. Take my whole life too._

_For I can’t help falling in love with you.”_

A sweet melody came deep within Cas’ throat and sent shivers up Dean’s spine. Then it changed to something slower, more harmonious, and romantic.

_“Love me tender, love me true._

_All my dreams fulfilled._

_For my darling, I love you._

_And I always will.”_

He felt himself beginning to hum with Cas and walked the short distance into the kitchen and came up behind Cas, wrapping his arms around his waist and finishing the last bit of the song.

_“Love me tender, love me true._

_All my dreams fulfilled._

_For my darling, I love you._

_And I always will.”_

Castiel turned in Dean’s arms and faced him, a smile that seemed so genuine.

“Dean, I did not know that you knew Elvis.”

“And I the same. Not gonna lie, I was kind of surprised you knew that song.”

“It was something that my mother used to play when we would be in the kitchen or sitting around the house. Are you okay with Elvis?”

“I can dig Elvis.” He leaned forward and met his lips with Cas’. The kiss was so sweet and soft. When they pulled away, Dean looked around the tiny kitchen and saw all the food sitting there. Castiel noticed and let out a small giggle.

“I decided that since I am living here now that I can make breakfast for us.”

“That’s awesome, Cas. I didn’t know you could do all this. We have a lot to learn about each other.”

“We do, Dean.”

Dean sat at the counter with his plate and dug in. The first bite of French toast made him moan. It was so warm, the flavors of vanilla and cinnamon melting together and then the powdered sugar on top adding a sweetness to it. Then the bacon just added to it. Perfectly crispy.

“You like it?”

He seemed to be pulled from a dream when Cas spoke, looking at him to find a teasing look on his face with a glint of mischievousness in his eyes.

“Yes, I do. Thanks for breakfast.” He stuck another piece of toast in his mouth to only moan again. This time he watched as Cas swallowed and his eyes seemed to be staring straight at Dean’s mouth. Is that really…?

So he did it again only this time, to make sure he licked his lips and moaned a little longer. When he opened his eyes, Cas was facing the sink, knuckles white as he gripped the counter. It was actually turning him on…. If only Dean could be that evil to him. He left the seat to wrap his arms around Cas’ waist and put his lips to his neck. The spot was warm and he smelled so good. He worked his way up to Cas’ ear and then back to his shoulder, leaving a trail of little red marks. One particular spot made Cas grip the counter harder and Dean felt a shiver run through him. He kissed it again and felt another shiver, this time causing a moan to start deep in Cas’ throat and escape his lips.

“Dean?”

“Hm?”

“Why are you doing this to me?”

“Because you made me breakfast so I am just thanking you in my own way.” He smiled his most charming smiling and watched as Cas literally went weak in the knees. He leaned into Dean and laughed. Dean looked up at the clock.

“Shit!”

“What, Dean?”

“I’m going to be late if I don’t leave in the next five minutes!”

“Don’t worry about the mess, I will clean it up.”

“I wasn’t going to clean it up anyway,” Dean yelled over his shoulder as he went into the bedroom. Dean could here Cas roll his eyes in the kitchen. He whipped on his shirt, pulled on jeans and his socks. Running into the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and fixed his hair, giving himself a onceover.

He ran to the kitchen and whipped on his boots. Giving Cas a quick kiss on the lips and flew out the door to his baby.

….

Dean pulled into the shop as Bobby was unlocking the door. He relaxed a little looking at the clock to see that he still had a minute before being late. Walking up to the door and clapping Bobby on the shoulder and seeing Adam and Jo already waiting, he said his hello’s and walked in going straight to his desk. He had plenty of paperwork to finish with the odd rush of cars they had the previous week. Bobby had parts to order while Jo and Adam worked on the couple of cars left from Friday night.

He thought about Cas moving into his apartment and realized that he needed to ask Jo and Adam if they could help him move and use Bobby’s truck. Cas himself that it would take maybe two trips because he didn’t own that much except for his clothes and a few other things.

Jo and Adam were in the shop with Jo leaning under the hood and Adam under the car, passing each other tools and parts.

“Hey guys?”

Dean then heard a bang and a groan come from under the car followed by a muffled “son of a bitch that hurt!” He couldn’t help the laugh that seemed to echo through the shop as Adam appeared from under the car rubbing the back of his head and a giggling Jo from under the hood.

“What’s up, Dean?”

“I was wondering if I could ask a favor from you guys.”

“Sure. What is it?” Adam still looked pissed from smacking his head but he nodded in agreement.

“Well… last night I asked Cas to move in with me,” Jo let our the first girly squeak he had ever heard come out of her, “and he said yes. I was hoping you two would be able to help move him in since he can’t really do anything at the moment.”

“Of course, Dean! Are you going to borrow Bobby’s truck?”

“I still have to ask him but I’m sure he’ll let me.”

“Yeah, I’m sure he will. But that’s great, Dean!”

“It’ll be official. Especially after everything with Crowley.”

“How long has it been since the last time you talked to him?”

“Almost 5 months.” 

Dean was quiet as he thought about how much had changed in the last month alone. Before he had met Cas, he was quiet, reserved, and drank. A lot. But then the one night at the laundry mat changed something. He was the first man that Dean had talked to that he hadn’t already known before Crowley. And now, he wasn’t moving in with him. Dean knew that he loved him, he was just waiting for the right time to say it. They had only known each other for a month it seemed like had known each other for so much longer. Cas had mentioned a couple nights before about how he had grown out of the small world he had built for himself. He really had no one around here, being that closest relatives were his brothers in Lawrence.

“Dean?

Jo pulled him from his daydream and realized that we was about to walk into the shop wall.

He laughed it off, “Thanks. So I can count on you two to help with the move?”

“Sure thing!” Dean went to go text Cas, telling him that Jo and Adam had agreed to help with the move but his phone was gone. He had plenty of work to do so he would tell him later.

** SPN **

_What is that ridiculous noise?_

Castiel was woken up a ringing coming from the bedroom. He had just laid down for a nap after cleaning up the breakfast mess. Lifting himself off the couch, he walked to the bedroom and found Dean’s phone lying on the bedside table. He looked at the screen and found that it had gone off two times before. Figuring it was someone for work, he looked at the most recent.

**From: 785-555-0603**

Hello, darling. I was wondering if we could get together again? We had so much fun, and usually in the bed. I miss my punching bag.

_What?_

Castiel could not think of anything but what he had just read. It could not be that Dean was actually cheating on him. They had been together for a short while, yes, but Dean had told him himself that he was the most important thing that had happened to him in a while. What he had meant by that, he did not know but he trusted him that they would be together for quite a time.

He had to call Dean.

Castiel dialed the shops number and waited as the phone seemed to ring forever.

“Singer and Son Mechanics. What can I help you with?”  A girl had answered the phone.

“Yes. This is Castiel. Is Dean there? It is an emergency.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, thank you. I just need to talk to him.”

A muffled noise came from the phone and then, “Cas?”

“Dean, I fell when I was cleaning dishes and I cannot seem to get up.”

“Be there in five.”

The line went dead and Castiel moved to the couch, waiting and thinking about the night they had met.

_Dean was explaining about how they weren’t his. Castiel stared at the man, admiring his facial structure. He has exceptional cheek bones and his jaw line was equally if not stronger. Castiel could cut something on it. His nose was crooked, looking as though he had been hit and never corrected the break. And his lips, Castiel wanted to touch them, to feel the roughness and warmth of them._

_He seemed so nice and trustworthy that night. He decided that talking to him would of helped with homesickness he was going through._

Castiel remembered the reaction that Dean had when he smiled.

_“I was not going to say anything, but since you brought it up.” Castiel gave him his best heart-warming smile. He watched, laughing inwardly as he saw Dean’s smile turn into a grin, almost taking up the lower half of his face. The smile causing small wrinkles by his eyes._

_Ones that Castiel hoped he would cause again._

The dead bolt and knob turned on the door and a worried and rushed Dean went straight to the kitchen to stop dead when Castiel was not to be found. He turned and found him instead on the couch. He held his head in his hands and was clasping Dean’s phone.

** SPN **

_Oh god, Sam._

Dean went to put a hand on Cas’ shoulder but he shrugged away and looked up at him with red eyes, tears running down his face.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Cas, what’s wrong? What happened?”

“Dean Winchester, I never thought that this would happen with you. I thought you were different and then this other man texts you asking you to ‘hook up’ again?” The worst part was he didn’t sound angry or accusing, he sounded hurt and disappointed.

He folded into himself, and his shoulders shook but no noise was coming from him; just tears streaming his face and onto the couch. Dean went to put his hand on his shoulder again but he shrugged it away again, as if it were diseased. Shoulders shook even harder causing Dean’s phone to fall out of his hands. He picked it up and looked at the text and felt himself go cold recognizing the number even after all these months.

“Cas? Please, you have the wrong idea. This person is no one. Cas…”

Nothing but the quiet sobbing, the worst kind.

“Castiel… ple- please.” Dean’s voice cracked as he forced back the tears that were threatening to brim over. He couldn’t lose Cas, he was his only piece of sanity after everything that the world seemed to put him through. Castiel moved to look at him, and closed his eyes as though he was about to hear the worst.

“Cas, this man, this _thing_ is- is what put me in the hospital.”


	10. Filling the Holes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean tells his past to Castiel, and he comforts him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoy this chapter!! Smut!!! and some angst. Feel free to review. Thanks again for reading!

** SPN **

Dean choked on a word, one that would give away just how much damage Crowley had done to him. The dreams still seemed so real and it had been almost five months. He didn’t press charges, didn't fight back, didn’t hurt him, he knew what Crowley did was wrong but what Dean also know was that Crowley was human and he couldn’t hurt him, not without the guilt. Dean did love him, or so he thought. Crowley could live with the guilt as punishment. The poor selfish bastard would suffer without someone there as his personal punching bag.

“One night, I was home resting. Out last fight has gotten pretty brutal. I remember sitting on the couch when Crowley stormed into the house reeking of alcohol. A glass of scotch was in his hand. He was going on about how I was mistrusting and that I didn’t deserve him; how ungrateful I was for everything that he had done for me. As if I should be grateful for the abuse that I went through. The only nice thing was he let me live in his condo, if I cleaned and did whatever he wanted.

He lifted me off the couch and against the wall, smacking my head against it. I was stunned with my black. Crowley had backed away and was waving the glass and his hands everywhere. He had said something about how the only way I learn is if I’m punished. Next thing, a glass is flying towards me, and I ducked against the wall. He had done this before but something was off. Right after he threw it, he came at me. Usually when he would hurt me in some way, immediately after he would apologize and say how much he loved me and all that other bullshit. Of course, I would fall for it every time. But this time, he charged with his arms out ready to grab my throat but I ducked in time.”

Dean took a deep breath and attempted to calm himself for the next part, the worst part.

“I fell to the ground and tried to crawl away. The last time he hurt me; he tripped me and hurt my ankle so I could barely walk. He grabbed me by my legs and pulled me back. I tried to grab onto something but there was nothing within reach. He rolled me over, sat on my stomach and began to punch me, just wailin’ on me. Hard.” Dean felt his hands turn into fists as he remembered the feeling of Crowley’s knuckled coming into contact with his face, his nose. He looked down at his whitening knuckles. Taking a breath, he looked at Cas and saw that he too had tears, more tears, reached for Dean’s hand. This sent the tears that had been brimming throughout the whole story to fall over, sliding down his cheek and into his lap. Dean didn’t care how much it hurt to tell, Cas needed to know that he wasn’t cheating on him, he would never- could never do that to him.

“After a couple of times, I gave up figh- fighting him off. Once he saw that he had won-,” Dean spared the details, “he used me until he was… satisfied.’

Dean looked as white as the pillow that sat on the couch, now wet with Castiel’s tears, ones that he himself had caused and he would never forgive himself. He felt himself give in to the fear and guilt that he had held for so long push through all the walls that he had built up. Leaning into Cas, he wrapped his arms around him and let every emotion that had bottled up for so long let go and flood him.

Castiel stroked the back of Dean’s head and told him that it was okay, that he was sorry. _Sorry for what?_ He had done nothing wrong. Dean would have reacted the same way if he had found that. None of this was Cas’ fault. He continued to say sorry for accusing him as he rubbed Dean’s back kissed his forehead, saying comforts to match every kiss.

“Dean, what happened then?”

“After he was done, he left the room laughing as I tried to pull the covers over me. Nothing had ever been that bad. He said something about how I tempted him too much, that it was my fault that he couldn’t control himself. I wanted to die. I didn’t see any way out of the hell I was in.

I picked myself up after he left, put my clothes on, and packed whatever I could find. I threw everything into baby and left. I went to the hospital to get the cuts taken care of and check for broken bones. Then once I was bandaged up, I drove to Stanford and found Sam. He took me in and let me stay there until I was better. He wasn’t too happy I didn’t want to press charges but I couldn’t bring myself to. Jess took care of me while Sam was in class. I could never thank her enough. ”

Dean finished it and looked at Cas, waiting for a reaction. But nothing came but a kiss, sweet and salty from the tears, but it held emotion that sent Dean’s head spinning. Cas pulled away and Dean hung head only to be lifted again by Cas’ strong and comforting hands.

“Dean, I am sorry. I know that you will say that it is not my fault and that it is yours but hear me out. I am sorry that I ever blamed you. I should have asked better. Dean, I will never hurt you like that, making you relive that hell. I couldn’t. I-,” Castiel took a breath, “I love you too much to lay a hand on you that wasn’t to comfort you.”

Dean couldn’t believe that he had heard him right. He sat, stunned and it finally sunk in.  “Castiel, you are the best thing that has happened to me. I’m not good with words and doing the whole speaking bit but I’m crazy about you. Whatever made me go up and talk to you that night, I have been thanking whomever for it. Cas, I love you.”

With that, Dean leaned in again and put his lips to Castiel’s. He put as much emotion as he could into it, and he must have, because a hand came up to his neck and sent shivers through him, rocking his body into Castiel’s.

A moan escaped Cas’ lips making them part and Dean took the opportunity. He slipped his tongue against his bottom lip and flicked the upper lip. He put more force into the kiss causing Cas to lean back onto the arm of the couch and Dean leaning over him, his hands on either side of his head. He moved to the crook at Cas’ neck and kissed his neck bones, rising another moan out of Cas and him grabbing onto Deans’ hips. He found the spot from that morning and kissed it again, sucking on it a little just to make Cas beg for more.

“Dean…”

He smiled into his neck and kissed his way back up to his mouth following the sharp jaw line. Looking into the deep blue eyes, he could get lost. They seemed to almost find Dean’s soul and all his emotions and bring them to the surface almost like he could read it.

“What, Cas?” He dipped back down kissing the nape of his neck and ground his pelvis into Castiel’s, feeling something pressing back.

“Dea- Dean. I think we should go somewhere else.”

“Oh yeah? To where would you like?” He grinned, knowing the answer.

“The bedroom would be a good place to start.”

“To start?”

This time, Castiel showed a menacing smile that made Dean immediately become hard, harder than what he already was.

“To start.”

“Then let’s go, cripple.” He climbed off Cas and slipped his arm under his shoulder blades and then under his legs, lifting him off the couch with ease. Walking the few steps to the bedroom, he walked in and put Cas on the bed. He closed the door, shut off his phone, took off his boots, and climbed into bed next to him. He put his hand on Cas’ cheek and laid a kiss, a soft one, onto his lips. A hand reached to grab the back of Deans’ head and grabbed the hairs at the base of his head. This time, Dean was the one to moan. Loud.

“Cas, are you wanting to do this?”

“I am if you are.”

“You have no idea.”

Dean slipped a hand underneath Cas’ shirt and felt his chest, warm and smooth. Dragging Cas to the middle of the bed, he climbed onto him, slipping both hands underneath the shirt and began working its way up to his arms. Cas sat up and raised his arms as the shirt was lifted over his head.

_God, Cas is hot._

Dean couldn’t stop himself from looking at his chest, the sculptured body perfect. He ran his hands along his chest, stopping on the nipples and working his way down. He stopped at the line of the sweat pants, playing with his hipbones. He leaned down and kissed them, flicking his tongue against them knowing it would drive him mad. He heard his name being muffled and looked up to find Cas with his arm over his mouth looking at the ceiling.

He took Cas’ hand and put it on his back and it automatically went under his shirt. It stopped on his abs, and he watched Cas gulp, then he took his other arm and put it under the shirt. Cas grabbed Dean’s hips and pulled him towards him, then he took his hands and ran his fingers down Deans’ back, causing him to moan and mumble, “Cas, that feels so good.” The shirt he was wearing suddenly became annoying and needed to be removed. Cas seemed to feel the same because he started lifting the shirt helping Dean remove it. It soon joined Cas’ on the floor.

“I have my stuff in the bathroom. Let me go grab it.”

“You can in a minute, I want to do something.” Cas’ voice changed to something that of fun, foreplay, and… charge.

He rolled Dean onto his back and put his hands on both sides of his head. He pressed his pelvis into Deans and the groan that came out of his mouth, Dean didn’t know he could make. It felt so good to have him there. Cas worked his way down to Dean’s chest where he licked Dean’s stomach and up to his nipple where he kissed then continued up to his neck where Dean was sure his eyes were begging for more.

“Cas… more. Please.”

** SPN **

Cas loved doing this to Dean. He worked his way to Deans’ jaw and looked to find Dean where his eyes screamed for more.

“Cas… more. Please.” It came out choked and raw.

This was Castiel’s favorite part about sex. The foreplay.

He continued to work his way up and down and again over Deans’ stomach. Then once he figured Dean and himself waited long enough, he went to Deans’ jeans. He was met with a bulge, and he kissed it, causing Dean to whimper and shake. He bit the button and undid it with his teeth, and then worked the pants down enough to expose the top of the boxers and the trail that lead to what Castiel wanted most. But it would have to wait for now.

He licked his tongue against his hipbones, and then began to wiggle the top of his boxers ever so slowly and replied with an impatient sound coming from Dean. He only went slower. Dean went to move them down but Cas swatted his hand away and moved them a little faster. Not fast enough for Dean.

Then when the boxers were all the way down except for the tip, he left it causing Dean to wait. He put his lips on the top of Dean’s dick and kissed up then down again. He did this a couple times, all the while the length of Dean seemed to grow.

Once he decided Dean had had enough waiting, pulled down the rest of the boxers and Deans’ dick stood straight up, waiting for Cas to take it in his mouth. He kissed his exposed thigh, moving his way up to the base and back again. Dean groaned as Cas continued to tease him, making him wait. Then all at once, Cas opened his mouth to take Dean’s length to the base. A loud moan filled with lust and pleasure filled the room and it made Cas groan back. The vibrations of the noise pulsed against Deans’ head. He moved his head up and down, licking around the tip of Dean’s length. He grabbed the base and moved his hand up and down as he began to suck on the tip, causing a shiver to run through Dean and pre cum to leak onto Cas’ tongue. It did not take long before Dean was moaning with every pump of Castiel’s hand.

“God… _Cas._ Make me cum. Please.”

He pumped faster and licked the tip, sucking gently to tease Dean. Then as Dean was about to cum, he stopped.

“Cas… what the he-?”  Cas crawled up Dean’s body and planted his lips on to his neck, causing Dean’s body to rock against Cas’. Dean’s cock pressed hard against him, making his own even harder. He couldn’t wait any longer.

“Go get it.” Cas laughed as he had never seen Dean jump from a bed as fast that. He was back before he blinked and was climbing onto the bed and knocking Cas into the pillows.

** SPN **

“You, are mine.” Dean took Cas sweat pants and played with the band, rubbing his fingers into the “v” shape that seemed to be etched perfectly into his body. He nipped at Cas’ hips, then he grabbed the pants on either side and pulled them down and off of him. Dean threw them to the ground to join the other clothes. He marveled at what laid before him. How could Cas want anything to do with him?

He took the lube out of the bedside table drawer which earned a skeptical look from Cas, and put some on his fingers. He grasped Cas’ dick and began to move his hand up and down, stroking it with pre-cum helping. Cas was very well off when it came to size and the thought of that made Dean nervous but he couldn’t wait to feel him, warm inside of him while rocking back and forth. He put the condom on with the help on Cas’ hand and nodded. He squeezed the lube into his hand and rubbed his cock which was already on the brink of orgasm and then taking two fingers, he went to Cas’ hole and lubed it. Taking the smaller of the two fingers, he slid one in and felt the tightness of him and the warmth.  After a few strokes, Dean took the second finger and pushed in with ease. He pumped a few times before sliding out. Grabbing the lube, he put more on his own, and then he looked down at Cas, and winked. He put the tip to the hole and pushed, Cas relaxing at the action. Cas was warm and tight and everything he wanted.

“God, Dean. Please,” he whined as Dean started out slow, testing his boundaries and pressure points. He moved to the left and a cry filled the room. He looked, afraid to see if he had hurt Cas but found Cas begging for more, deeply breathing as he grabbed Dean’s hand and intertwined their fingers. He pushed again, slower this time and watched as Cas’ head tipped back and his throat tightened letting out a moan that almost pushed Dean over the edge. But he grabbed Cas’ dick and began to pump as he pushed into the spot over and over again. He moved away from to tease Cas but pumped faster, leaking pre-cum onto his hands and down Cas’ shaft.

“Cum in me. Dean, cum in me.”

He began to hit Cas’ prostate again, the spot that seemed to push him closer and closer. Then cum went onto Cas’ stomach Dean’s hand, using that to move his hand up and down as his hole tightened around Dean’s hard dick. He came so much and Dean wasn’t far behind him. A few more pumps and Dean was cumming inside Cas. It felt so good to release. He held still with his knees going weak until he collapsed onto Cas, his dick still resting inside him. He started to kiss Cas’ chest and neck to make his way to the cum that was now sticky on his stomach. Dean moved against him, causing them both to moan in harmonization. His heartbeat was through the roof, so loud that he could barely here Cas begging for more.  

“Round two?”

Dean chuckled at how ready Cas was when he had just cum, wanting to feel the endorphins running wild in him. He planted his lips to Cas’ and they moved in unison. He slipped his tongue into Cas’ mouth and slid it along his bottom lip and teeth. The lip was sweet; Dean bit down ever so gently on it and felt Cas gasp in surprise as a shudder ran through him. His eyebrows furrowed as he deepened the kiss, attempting to put every emotion that he could into it. The love, protection, and happiness that Cas brought him, especially now when it seemed as though every empty spot on Dean’s soul filled with contentment and memories, the possibility of a future with Cas.

He rolled off Cas but careful to not take out his dick. He grabbed him around the waste and rolled them onto their sides lying next to each other. A sudden wave of being tired washed over Dean. He closed his eyes listening to Cas breathing.  Then his neck was being nuzzled by a head, one with messy hair that was soft and smelt like Cas’ cologne.

Soon, their breathing slowed and held onto each other. Neither one had moved, just lying next to each other was enough. Dean soon drifted off to sleep thinking about his angel in his arms. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you guys think??? I hope you all enjoyed it. Dean's story is a little upsetting but it plays into his character majorly and upcoming events. ;) Again, please feel free to review!


	11. One Note to the Next

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean wakes to find his phone ringing and Cas wakes to an empty apartment.

Dean woke to find Cas lying in bed, snoring softly and watched his chest rise and fall. He smiles as the man next to him rolls onto his side, curling into a ball with the covers pulled tight over him allowing only a small portion of his face to be visible. Dean chuckled at him as he turned to grab his phone off the night stand. It vibrated as he picked it up, and he paused wondering who would be text him this early in the morning. He figured it was Sam, and ignored looking at the time on the small front screen. It was 7:03 a.m. and he didn’t have work today. The sound of rain hitting the windows made Dean turn to see a dark, cloudy sky telling him to stay inside that day.

That was okay with him.

A couple of times, Cas and him had talked about movies they loved to watch and Dean said “The Breakfast Club”. Cas shook his head and said “Why is there a movie about breakfast, Dean?” His face rang seriousness, not even a squint of the eye to show the joke lying behind the question. The laughter that came out of Dean hurt his sides in the way only laughing can. He wiped a tear from his eye, “It’s not about breakfast, Cas. Well, not really. It’s about a group of kids who have detention together on a Saturday morning and they learn about each other and themselves. We are going to watch this movie because it is a rite of passage.” With that, they continued on the conversation about others to watch.

A rumbling sound came from Dean’s stomach, sounding as though it was going to start eating itself if it wasn’t fed soon. He flipped the covers off himself, leaning over to kiss Cas on the only visible skin and then swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He still only had on boxers from the night before. Things had gotten a little hot. He could still feel the ghosts of fingers lightly touching his shoulder and making their way to his hands, intertwining themselves. Soft lips pressed against the nape of his neck, working their way up to his ear and down his jaw bone, sending a shiver through him.

Dean smiled and rubbed his neck where those lips had been only a short while ago it seemed. Just as he lifted himself off the bed, a buzzing sound came from his bedside table.

_Again? I bet it’s Sam with only God-knows-what._

He flipped open his phone to find 17 new text messages from a number he hated to see. Three missed calls also graced the phone.

**From: 785-555-0603 sent: 3:14 a.m.**

Hello, Dean. I was hoping that you would have called me yesterday? That wasn’t very polite of you, Dean.

**From: 785-555-0603 sent: 3:28 a.m.**

Dean, you can’t possibly be busy. You wouldn’t let anyone touch you but me, right darling?

**From: 785-555-0603 sent: 4:15 a.m.**

Answer me, Dean.

**From: 785-555-0603 sent: 5:23 a.m.**

Dean, I want you to answer me. Don’t lie to me, telling me that you found someone who accepts you. That is a load of shit. I know that you won’t find anyone because you are worthless, a moron, and nothing. I make you everything you ever will be.

**From: 785-555-0603 sent: 5:24 a.m.**

If you are dating someone, I will find out who they are. Trust me, I can take them away from you. You’ve met the men I work with so don’t think that you are an exception. I will get you back, whether willingly or by force. Your choice.

In between, other messages had been sent; some worse than others. Dean was at a loss for words. Why would Crowley want anything to do with him? Now? It had been months since they had last talked and now that things were going great with Cas, he had to show up again?

Dean looked at Cas, sleeping soundly on the bed, warn out from the night before. He couldn’t risk Cas being hurt, nothing is more important than him. He decided that he would meet Crowley, tell him that the police were involved and that he could do nothing to scare Dean any longer. He wasn’t afraid anymore.

Slipping on jeans and a shirt, he went to the kitchen and called Crowley.

“Hello, Darling. Did you finally realize that no one could ever like the moron you are?”

“No, but I’m willing to meet you.”

“The warehouse. You know which one. Now.”

“Don’t try anything.” With that, he hung up, not letting Crowley get into his head any more than necessary.  This was going to be the final time that he ever saw him again. Dean would make sure of that.

He crossed to the sink and crouched down to look underneath. There, taped up against the top of the cupboard, was a handgun. Dean had bought it after finding his own place, not feeling safe in less he had one. What if Crowley had found him and decided that he wanted to pay a visit?

Dean tucked it into the back of his jeans, feeling the cold handle against his back. He pulled on his shoes, then grabbed a piece of paper and pen from the junk drawer.

**_Cas-_ **

**_I’ll be back soon. Had to run somewhere._ **

**_Start the popcorn and we’ll watch the movies we’ve been talking about._ **

**_-Dean_ **

After all, he wasn’t going to be gone long, just to threaten Crowley enough to leave him alone. Easy. He walked back to the bedroom where Cas was now spread eagled on his stomach with a pillow tucked under his left arm. The covers engulfed his bottom half, showing only the dip on his lower back. Leaning over, he kissed him and turned to leave the room. He walked through the small kitchen and looked around. Dean was content, happy for once with the choices he was making and who he would be making them with. Everything seemed to be falling into place, except for this one kink that he would smooth over.

Dean reached the car, unlocking the door and opened it hearing the familiar squeak and grind of the hinges on the classic.. He slid into the warn seat, curved to fit him and the old spots on the steering wheel where he always rested his hands when driving. Flipping through the tapes, he picked his favorite Led Zeppelin tape, the opening to “Ramble On” pouring out the speakers. He pulled out onto the street, humming along to the guitar intro.

 This car could tell stories that no one would believe but Dean knew them all by heart; if he was there or not The Lego pieces that Dean shoved into the heater vents when he was younger; to do this day when the heat comes on, you can hear them rattle. The army man that was crammed into the back seat ash tray that was still there. And of course, Sam and Dean’s initials carved into her. They were still there, all her imperfections because that’s what Dean loved about her most was that she was _theirs_ , and always will be.

He looked into the review mirror and saw the building that now felt like his home, not knowing that things were about to go very wrong.

** SPN **

_It was too cold. Need more blankets._

Castiel grabbed the comforter and wrapped it around himself. He curled into a ball, attempting to keep as much heat in his blankets as possible. He heard the bed squeak behind him, and then a phone buzz. And again. It was Dean’s and probably Sam with a random question. He seemed to do a lot especially with the wedding around the corner. Once, Dean called him a “ puppy” because he lost his shoe and texted Dean to see what he should do about the situation.

Lips startled Castiel as they touched the only exposed piece of skin, leaving a warm trace on him.

Dean moved away from the bed and soon the familiar creek of the floorboards that were outside the room could be heard. Castiel snuggled more, half-attempting to tuck the blankets around his feet. He soon was calm and drifted off to sleep once more.

….

Castiel woke to a quiet and cold room. The rain hit the window echoing throughout the apartment.  His arm, as if by habit, when to the other side of the bed where the sheets were cold and unfortunately empty. His brow furrowed as he tried to figure where Dean had gone. Dean did not have work that day or any appointments that he knew of. He may be in the kitchen but something was off. Everything was too quiet.

….

_He stumbled into the kitchen, attempting to keep his bare feet off the cold floor as much as he could. Soft rock could be heard filling the kitchen, bouncing off the walls and back to Castiel where he stood and watched Dean making breakfast. The small room was buzzing with sound and energy even with one person standing in it._

_Castiel’s arms found their way to Dean’s waist and wrapped themselves around it. A chuckle vibrated through him that made Castiel’s face warm as he leaned his cheek to his back._

….

Something was off.

He climbed out of the bed, now cold. Making his way to the kitchen, his socks making the floor slippery as he listened for music, humming, a noise or anything but all was quiet.

Castiel entered the room to find it lit by a single lamp in the corner casting an eerie glow when mixed with the washed out tone that the clouds spilled into the apartment.

A note was lying on the counter.

 

**_Cas-_ **

**_I can’t do this anymore. I left you everything. I need my space and I made a mistake. After dating, getting this serious was wrong. At least I didn’t ask you to move in. I’m sorry._ **

**_-Dean_ **

_...What?_

Castiel read the note one, two, three times before he sunk into the bar stool, cringing as he held the note in his hands. The note from the man who he thought he loved and whom he thought loved him back. Tears stung as he read this over and over, finally spilling over when reading the “I’m sorry.”

Something was off though, through the pain that was ripping him apart, there was something not settling right.  Yes, Castiel understood that Dean could leave at any time, but why now, after last night?

That is when Castiel’s eyes snapped to the note seeing the words “I didn’t ask you to move in”. But he had. They had last night, agreed to moving in with each other. Then… Castiel’s cheeks grew warm with the memories flooding back to him and realization striking him.

This wasn’t Dean’s note.

He looked at the letters, at the differences in all the notes that had been left by Castiel’s bed or on the fridge for groceries. Anyone could see that the letters were similar but clearly not the same.

Castiel went back to the bedroom grabbing his phone off the bed, looking at messages.

One, from Dean.

**From 785-555-0124 sent 7:38 a.m.**

Hey babe, be back in a bit. See you around nine and can’t wait for our movie day.

The clock on the bedside table now read 9:34 a.m. Something was wrong or Dean was lying to him. One of these were plausible and Castiel had a sinking feeling in his stomach thinking of the possibility that Dean may be hurt, or- he gripped the counter has his head swam making everything go black.

Dialing the number that he knew so well after such a short time, Castiel pressed the phone to his ear. With all the exchanged texts and calls; nights filled with questions and ideas, pressing the buttons had become as easy as breathing.

Each ring seeming to space further and further apart, “Hey, this is Dean. If you get this I can’t come to the phone right now but you know what to do.” Click.

He could not over react like this. This was something that could have been a misunderstanding. Castiel tried to calm himself but he paced, keeping his weight off his leg and started to ware tracks in the floor. He dialed the number again and no answer.

Castiel called three more time in fifteen minutes, his stomach reacting to his mind jumping to the worst conclusion.

He dialed Sam’s number and listened as it rang one, two-.

“Hey, Cas. What’s up?”

“Dean’s gone.”

“Hold on, Jess is watching a show.”

He heard muffled movement and a closing door, then “Okay, Cas. What did you say now?”

“Dean- he’s gone. He left a note on the counter, at least I think he did and said that he was done. He had made a mistake. Sam, what is going on?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t talked to him and we were supposed to talk today. Let me call him and we’ll figure this out okay?”

“Okay, call me. Please.”

“I will. Promise.”

A click and the line went dead. Nothing seemed real. The room began to spin and for the second time in a matter of minutes, Castiel clung to the counter to brace himself from meeting the floor.

He looked around the small apartment to see evidence of Dean everywhere. The blanket on the couch that had been tossed to the side, the pillows askew from their “chick flick moment” as Dean would have called it. A coffee cup sat by the sink, now cold and the remote for the television left on the coffee table next to the newspaper.

Castiel’s heart sank deeper recognizing the small pieces of Dean that made this apartment home.

_Ring!_

He jumped hearing his phone ring and hit the green button.

“So?”

“He isn’t answering, Cas. I don’t know what to do. We both know that he wouldn’t just do this to you. Something isn’t adding up.”

“Should I go to the police?”

“Inform them, let them know that he is missing and we’ll figure this out. I am going to tell Jess and give me a call when you get done calling them.”

“Okay.”

Click.

Again, the room was now silent, cold, and empty without Dean there and the drizzly soft gray hue that fell over it.

His hand reacted on its own, dialing on the phone and pressing it to his ear.

“Hello, this is Lebanon Police Department. Please state your name and emergency.”

“My name is Castiel and I believe that my- my friend has been kidnapped or hurt. I don’t know.”

“Sir, you know this is a ser-.”

“I am aware of this, thank you. I am not a teenager pulling a prank or a college student forgetting the events of the night before. My boyfriend is missing. He left this morning and sent me a message telling me that he would be back by 9 and it is now,” he looked at the clock that now read 10:20 a.m. “almost 10:30 in the morning. He is hardly ever late and if he is, it is by ten minutes at the most.

Another reason I believe is because when I walked into the kitchen and found a hand written note reading, ‘Cas- I can’t do this anymore. I left you everything. I need my space and I made a mistake. After dating, getting this serious was wrong. At least I didn’t ask you to move in. I’m sorry. Dean.’,” his voice hitched at the end, saying his name out loud to a stranger, of all. This was happening and his Dean was gone.

“I know this may seem insignificant to you but Friday night, he asked me to move in. I said yes. In the note, he clearly states that he _did not._ Now are you going to help me or not?”

Silence from the other end of the phone followed by, “Alright, sir. We are going to need everything that you have on your boyfriend; phone number, relatives, jobs, schooling, past relationships, people who would like revenge. I know this will not be easy for you as well but we will need information on you.”

He stood in the kitchen, telling her all that he knew, and then on himself. Twenty minutes later, it had been given for a search going out for him, looking for some kind of evidence that he had last been seen. Castiel was asked to come to the station for an interview, to rule him out as a suspect.

He then dialed Sam back, reviewing the conversation and letting him know what the cops were going to do.

“It’ll be okay, Cas. We’ll find him. I’m sure he is okay plus it helps that he can kick some ass.” He chuckled on the other end of the line, attempting to lighten the mood.

“Yeah, I know- I know something is not right with this. He asked me to move in Friday night, Sam. The note says he had not. This is not his note.”

Sam was quiet on the other end of the line. Which was rare, “ _he_ asked _you_ to move in?” the skepticism was clear in Sam’s voice.

“Yes, last night. I do not understand the confusion.”

“Just- he’s never asked anyone to move in. There was Crowley and Dean moved in with him but we both know it wasn’t out of free will.”

Castiel thoughts melted together, causing his mind to go numb with worry and happiness and a sense of- honor as it seemed, blurring together like an abstract painting. Friday had all been so clear, their first real date after all their time together. Dean dropped everything for him and did so much more. He could not help the sadness that bubbled through him finally reaching his eyes causing his vision to blur. His breath caught as he began to talk to Sam, “If I am the first one, could this have caused him to run? To leave me behind after everything?”

Again, Sam was quiet and Castiel was slowly losing his patience, “just tell me the truth, Sam. I want to know.”

A simple word reached Castiel’s ear, “yes.”

He knew it was true, eyes closing refusing to look at his surroundings and acknowledge the truth that was now strewn in front of him. Forcing himself to open his eyes, they went to the clock, “I have to go to the police station, Sam. I do not know what to do.”

Sam walked him through the process of talking to the detectives or cops working the case. Since it was fresh and not twenty-four hours old, they would take it slow and only ask the major questions and avoid details. Then mid-sentence, talking about body language, “Cas, I could be your lawyer. I could represent you in the case. I’ll ask my advisor being that I only have a semester left before I get my certificate. It would be perfect! You wouldn’t owe me anything, Cas. Just let me, please.”

“Sam, I could not possibly accept that kind of a gift. I am more than grateful but-.”

“Cas, please,” almost pleading, “this is my brother we are talking about. I want to know what is happening with the case as it happens. Please….”

“Okay, as long as it is legal then we will proceed with it. Sam, we need to find him.”

“I know, Cas. And we will.”

They said their goodbyes and hit end. Castiel walked back to the room pulling on a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt to go. Slipping on his shoes and a jacket, he walked out the door leaving Dean there.

….

“My name is Castiel Dmitri Novak. I go to school while working but a recent accident has forbade me to do so. I have been living with Dean Ross Winchester while he helps take care of me since I can no longer do so until healed. We met almost four months ago at a laundry mat, and it continued from there. Then Friday night, we went on a date then afterwards we went on a short walk as I cannot walk far, and there in the park he asked me to move in. I agreed. Then last night we were in a fight but resolved the issue,” Castiel’s face and neck growing warm with the memory flooding his mind, “Then this morning I awoke in the empty apartment to find the note on the counter saying one message while the text message on my phone said another. I have reason to believe that something is not right. He would not leave like this,” at least he hoped, “without explaining why. He had an ex-boyfriend that was controlling and abusive. I don’t know if he has anything to do with it but as you can see, it is my only hope.” He hung his head, emotions overwhelming him and sudden urge to sleep.

“You said that you were in a fight last night? Could you tell me more about that, sir?” The cop motioned for him to continue with the story. The walk into the precinct was awkward, unnerving, and cold. Castiel felt very out of place and treated as if though guilty. The cop working the questioning was rude, a tall man who was African-American with a goatee and held his ego above all. His name was Victor, Castiel thought.

“Yes. I found messages on Dean’s phone that were from the ex-boyfriend. I was frightened, hurt, and scared. I did not know what to think or do, so I called him at work to call him home. He came home to find me on the couch. I questioned him about the text messages when I found out about Crowley. He was abusive, controlling, awful man who left Dean hurt multiple times. The final time, Crowley took it too far. Dean crawled across the floor, struggling to stand and once he could, he gathered his belongings and left. The pain that swept through his eyes was unbearable. After talking, we made up. But after he left Crowley, a month after, we met. I understood, and I promised him that I would never hurt him if I could help it. Dean deserves so much and more, I hope to give it to him.” That was all Castiel could bare before he broke, tears falling over and exposing all he was trying to hide. Wiping his eyes and face, he looked at Victor.

“What we’re gonna do, Castiel is call his phone and see if we can get a signal. If we can, we will go immediately, but if not, we’re left with clues and things only you and his brother would know. I’m going to grab another detective and continue with the investigation. I’ll be right back.”

Victor left the small room; leaving Castiel alone with his thoughts, Dean ran through his mind once more going back to the night in the laundry mat and the beginning of a new Castiel. After everything that had happened, he finally found a friend. This friend now turned out to be more.

The door swung open causing the blinds to swing smacking the back of the door and glass panel.

A tall man with gray hair and short gray beard stared at him. A menacing look in his eye, walked over to Castiel and shook his hand. A strong grip and noticed a small tattoo marking his skin.

With a small lisp and coming from the throat, a gruff voice came from the man. “Hello, sir. My name is Alastair and I’m the other detective on the case,” then a small smile curved up one side of the man’s face.


	12. An Uneasy Feeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I am soooooo sorry that I haven't been able to update lately and I know that this chapter is short. But please continue to bare with me. College has kept me crazy busy and once my semester is up, I can continue writing. Like I said y'all, I am very sorry about this and I hope this can hold you over till the next one. 
> 
> But I would like to say thank you for those who continue to read and stay up-to-date with it. Thank you!! ^.^

** SPN **

Castiel had an uneasy feeling flood through his body, shaking the part of his mind that was not focused on Dean. The one on the left was Victor and on the right was Alastair. Mainly looking at Victor, he asked what they knew so far.

With a deep sigh, “since the case is still fresh and it hasn’t been 24 hours yet, there is little we can do right now. But-,” he held up a finger to stop Castiel from protesting, “We did pull a couple other missing persons cases from this past year and found that it is similar to some of them. Some were left notes, other just vanished, and some suddenly show up not knowing where they are. But they all begin with one similar interest. All men, late twenties and early thirties, some gay and some not. But the one thing they all had in common was a group. They all called themselves Demons. Of course, they had their head guy but every “demon” we catch either won’t talk or die before we can question.” Castiel wanted to know why they had died before the police were able to question but second though, knowing it would not be smart to ask.

“There’s little we know about the group. It seems something is always misplaced when it comes to dealing with this group. So now that we have an idea, there are two detectives working on it only with a select few on the team. Castiel, we need to keep all ways of communication in case they try to call for ransom or if we hear anything. Okay?” Victor stood up from leaning on the table to nod at Alastair, who followed soot and walked out of the small room leaving Castiel uneasy.

“Don’t worry about him, Castiel. He’s one of the best but comes off mean. I’m sorry about Dean but don’t let this stop your normal routine. I have dealt with too many cases to know that stopping your life messes with you more than just going through routine.” Castiel nodded, assuming that Victor could feel the waves of tension and nerves rolling off him.  

He walked in front of Agent Victor, leaving the precinct feeling just as bad when he came in. He needed to call Sam and let him know what was happening…

** SPN **

Dean pulled up to the warehouse he knew well; a place that Crowley liked to throw people if they misbehaved. Dean’s insides began to boil with hate towards the man that was through those doors.

Walking through the heavy metal door, he spotted two men to his right. Turning, he saw the short, dark haired man standing just behind them. Crowley was short to Dean but his ego made up for it, dark hair and dark eyes, with a heavy Scottish accent that had Dean willing but now made him loathe the man and send a shiver of memories up his spine.

“Glad to see you made it back. I knew you would come crawling back shortly.”

Dean rolled his eyes, his fists clenching at his sides. “I’m not here to negotiate and I’m sure as not here to come ‘crawling’ back to you. I feel sorry for the new pet you are beating too. At least I made it out.” Even with the great distance between them, Dean started growing nervous, knowing something isn’t right, but Dean continued to fight.

“I don’t know what you’re planning Crowley but I’m done. If you contact me again I will get the police and you’ll get put away for a long time and I will make sure of that.” Dean turned to leave, reaching for the handle when a bullet missed his hand by inches.

“Oh, Dean, I forgot to tell you that you have no choice. You’re not leaving, making you mine.” He felt like he was going to be sick with no one knowing where he is, Cas being home alone and Sam meeting him later that day. Dean raised his hands above his head, deciding to play along.

“Okay, Crowley. I’ll play. Why do-,” when he felt a hand brush against his back taking the gun from his back pocket.

“Were you planning on going out, oh what do you call it… blazing, Dean?” Dean could hear the smile and his ego flooding through to his voice.

“If that’s all I had, then yeah.”

“You act as if your Sam-squatch of a brother is actually going to care. He has- Jess, isn’t it? So why does he need his protective brother anymore?” A laugh as dark as one made by Lucifer himself echoed through the warehouse; “trust me Dean, you won’t be needing that anymore.”

Dean felt a crack against the back of his head, sending him forward where his face met the cool concrete, seeing Crowley walking towards him before going black.

** SPN **

Crowley walked around Dean's still body, feeling in control. He turned to one of the men standing next to him, "I want him strung up somewhere that is sound proof. Got it? He's got a set of lungs." He snickered as he left the room, walking back to the office area of the deserted building.

A burly man, about 6'5" that could have been a professional body builder sat in front of Crowley with a troubled look on his face. 

“What is it _now_ , Jake?” Crowley looked at the ex-soldier.

“Why do we have Dean, sir? What’s the point of having him if he doesn’t have money or a person or for you to keep him?” Worry flashed through Jake’s eyes as he watched Crowley sit up in his chair, moving the bottle of 22 year-old scotch before crossing his hands on the desk.

“Jake, right? Okay, listen. I don’t care about the money. I want to be king. And he has to be my loyal maiden who listens at all times and does whatever I tell him to do. If I can’t have him, then to put it simply, no one can.” With that, he sat back in the chair with a glass of scotch in the hand.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! I was inspired by a piece of fanart on Tumblr and couldn't resist writing it! Please feel free to review :D


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